


In Retrospect: Could we have prevented this?

by Fallen_Skys



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School, Dangan Ronpa Zero, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Abuse of Power, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Angst, Angst and Feels, Bad Parenting, Broken Families, Character Death, Dialogue Heavy, Dysfunctional Family, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Everyone Has Issues, Family Loss, Found Family, Haircuts, Hajime gets attacked, Hajime has anxiety and depression, Hajime is in a coma, Heavy Angst, Hinata Hajime & Nanami Chiaki Friendship, Hinata Hajime and Kamukura Izuru Are Siblings, Hinata Hajime and Kamukura Izuru Are Twins, Hinata Hajime and Kamukura Izuru are Separate People, Hospitalization, Human Nanami Chiaki, Izuru has depression, Izuru has feelings for Matsuda but doesn't know what they are, Kamukura Izuru Has Feelings, Kamukura Izuru Is Bad At Feelings, Komaeda Nagito Being Komaeda Nagito, Loss of Trust, Miaya is shorter because I say so, Nagito Komaeda doesn't have frontotemporal dementia he's just awkward, Natsumi Kuzuryu is in a coma too, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Not Beta Read, Other, Parental favoritism, Past Sexual Assault, Reserve Course is hell, Sad with a Happy Ending, Sato is Juzo Sakakura's relative, She will also fuck up anyone who messes with her friends, Tragedy, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Yasuke Matsuda Miaya Gekkogahara and Izuru are friends, Yasuke Matsuda needs to sleep, assault trying to be covered up as a suicide attempt, he still has cancer though, the teachers are asshole in the Reserve Course, various points of view
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:27:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 38,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27411196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fallen_Skys/pseuds/Fallen_Skys
Summary: No one though Hajime Hinata was someone important, just someone that thought he was important. His brother was in the Main Course while he was in the Reserve Course. So when rumor goes around that the plainest, most average, most talentless guy in the Reserve Course attempted suicide most students only laughed at the fact the boy couldn't even kill himself correctly. No one ever thought that the kid's condition would lead to an investigation of the entire Reserve Course, why the Principal and Director of Hope's Peak Academy Jin Kirigiri was forcing all faculty to hand over their grading rubrics and student work for the entire year, and why the police were investigating a bullying case turned assault and attempted murder of the boy who they all though just jumped off one of the school buildings.Yes, no one thought that Hajime Hinata's comatose condition would lead to so many people experiencing so much pain, grief, and complicated mess of emotions, especially when his own twin seems to be spiraling into a greater depression without him around.The question a lot of them ask though is: "Why didn't I do something sooner? " as many do in retrospect.
Relationships: Enoshima Junko/Matsuda Yasuke, Gekkogahara Miaya & Kamukura Izuru, Gekkogahara Miaya & Matsuda Yasuke, Gekkogahara Miaya & Usami | Monomi, Hinata Hajime & Everyone, Hinata Hajime & Kamukura Izuru, Hinata Hajime & Komaeda Nagito, Hinata Hajime & Nanami Chiaki, Hinata Hajime & Original Character(s), Hinata Hajime & Yukizome Chisa, Hinata Hajime & gekkogahara Miaya, Kamukura Izuru & Matsuda Yasuke, Kamukura Izuru/Matsuda Yasuke, Sonia Nevermind & Kamukura Izuru
Comments: 73
Kudos: 176





	1. Chisa's Failure

**Author's Note:**

> So if you all missed the warning or the tags.  
> TRIGGER/CONTENT WARNING: Mentions of sexual assault by other minors, bullying, harassment, physical trauma, blood, coma, wounds, mentions of broken bones, depression, anxiety, self-depreciation, victim blaming, abuse of power, teachers abusing their power over students, parental favoritism, mentions of sexual intentions to avoid problems, suicidal ideation, parental neglect, mental illnesses in general, implied/mentioned cheating, panic attacks, accidental self-harm, cancer, death, etc. 
> 
> This is a heavy emotional fanfiction and it's supposed to be how Hajime suffered and how others are suffering because of the suffering he endured while no one paid attention or blatantly ignored his cries for help. So see notes below if you or anyone you know (these work in the USA at least as far as I remember) for help if you guys are struggling with anything.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chisa Yukizome is a good teacher at least that's what she thought before ...

Chisa Yukizome thought she was on the right track to being a good teacher. She thought that she was getting through to the kids under her tutelage and by extension their other friends that they were acquainted with whether they be within the Main or the Reserve Courses. While going through in secret to uncover what the school was doing with all of the money from the Reserve Course students and the dark secrets it seemed to be hiding. Chisa had been noticing some strange occurrences that she wished she acted upon earlier. The signs were all there, she had even seen the requests and papers herself sent to the Headmaster’s Office while visiting Jin Kirigiri, or how the boy and the Security Chief Juzo Sakakura would lock eyes in a glare, the teen visibly shaking in anger every time and clutching his bag, excusing himself off quickly to run to the dorms because it was getting late. Yes, Chisa already knew there was a problem, but she pushed it aside because she was more worried about her class than the other boy, thinking that his teacher in the Reserve Course was taking care of him.

That was her next mistake; to think that the teachers there cared even a fraction of a percentage as much as the teachers in the Main Course cared about their students was a joke. The teachers gave him extra assignments for no designated reason while the rest of the class didn’t receive them, his grades dropping suddenly despite being so high previously, mismarked assignments and tests. The number of exams and assignments she and Juzo collected that had to be regarded for the child was horrid and nearly brought her to tears. All of this extra work on top of switching him to Class Representative suddenly without his permission if the few students who were willing to talk to them were anything to go by. His desk was covered in profanities and graffiti, permanent marker littering every centimeter with words of _‘Go Home’ , ‘Talentless’, ‘Loser’, ‘Die’, ‘You Have No Talent’, ‘Must be nice being Rich’, ‘Greedy’, ‘Useless’, ‘Jump off the Roof Already’_ and many other phrases that even when Mahiru offered to help them with photographing everything she was close tears herself to see her friend’s classmate treated so cruelly.

Her third mistake was ignoring her phone that day. Izuru Hinata, The Ultimate of Ultimates, Ultimate Master of Trades, the Ultimate Hope as Hope’s Peak liked to call him, or as Chisa liked to call him, Izuru Hinata her Ultimate Enigma Student and twin brother to Reserve Course student Hajime Hinata. She was told by Jin Kirigiri that both Hajime and Izuru had a brawl earlier that week, and she was in charge of the cleanup and the apologies that followed. Apparently Hajime somehow found a way to even surprise his twin by using a combination of flash bangs, a perfume bomb, and some sort of sound device to make it an even playing field for them to “duke it out”, which only ended when she came into the gymnasium to see what all of the explosions were about and why both the school’s star student and said student’s twin were bruising each other up. As Izuru put it Hajime was “Upset over stupid things, and the fact he was upset over something I said is so boringly predictable that it’s annoying. He just has thin skin.” Clearly her student didn’t understand that whatever he said to his twin really upset Hajime to the point of physical violence. And although she has seen the boy get verbally aggressive with others, and once physically aggressive with Juzo, in which Juzo _did_ instigate it, the boy seemed to keep to himself most times. So that day while she kept her phone off to the side, trying to finish this pile of paperwork that the two boys caused for her, she couldn’t help but be a little exasperated when she saw Hajime’s name pop up on the screen. She had given the boy her number in case of emergencies and emergencies only, but her mind wasn’t in a good place that day so she hung up. Seconds later when his name popped up again, she repeated the process, the papers in front of her causing her endless frustration, and her mind telling her lies of the call being unimportant. So when it rang a third time, and a fourth time, she repeated the same motion trying desperately to get the papers finished before Jin would leave for the day. So, when the phone rang an hour later with Jin’s name appearing on the screen she froze.

_“Y-Yes Yukizome speaking!” She was nervous, hands trembling when she heard sirens in the background and the yelling of officers telling people to stay back._

_“Yukizome. I’m sorry I can’t meet you right now there’s something urgent happening right now and I have to take care of it immediately.”_

_“Urgent? What happened?” His voice sounded out of breath like he was exhausted trying to keep calm himself._

_“There was… there was a student assault or suicide attempt, it’s hard to tell. They are critically injured right now and are being sent to the hospital as we speak but I need to go with the police for questioning as one of the students somewhat witnessed what happened but they are in a lot of shock right now.”_

_“Who was it that was hurt? Was it someone from the Main Course?” Chisa almost thought she heard Jin laugh, whether it was an amused or bitter one she wasn’t sure but it sounded like he was in pain._

_“No… It was a student from the Reserve Course. Actually, it’s the one who hangs around some of your students. Hajime Hinata was found in the courtyard. Seems Izuru was going to meet him there and was running late, and when he arrived there was Hajime laying there. He said he tried calling Hajime first and heard shuffling of shoes running away, and he saw someone run off with Hajime’s things. But well…”_

_“He couldn’t run after them if Hajime was injured… but you said the student is in shock of what happened? I find it hard to believe Izuru is in shock. Is that really true?” Chisa knew she sounded cruel, it was like she was insinuating that her student shouldn’t be affected by his brother’s life-threatening situation, but for the teenager who could do just about anything it was sometimes hard to believe he was human at times._

_“Yes, he seems to be out of sorts, I have to get going now they need me for permission to search the grounds for those students and Hajime’s missing bag. Yukizome please have your students be careful going to their homes alright?”_

_“Alright I will make sure they get home safely Director, please take care of the Hinatas for me in my place “And without even a goodbye the director hung up on her that day and Chisa found herself crying for the first time in a long time. Tears of shame._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are much appreciated! Also thank you all for reading!


	2. 77-B's Apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Class 77-B is in the midst of some chaos with two core members of their class ditching them, but their attitudes seem to be partly at fault for why those two are avoiding class....

“I’m just saying we don’t really even know the guy and it’s not like we were the ones bullying him so why do we have to write a written apology to Hina-ow! Why did your evil hamsters bite me!”

“My Dark Devas have only given you punishment equal to that rudeness to which you have given to Nanami’s spikey-haired adventurer. And you did indeed cause a considerable amount of harassment by spreading around those videos of Hinata having a panic attack while at a maths tourney that he was forced to attend. The dark warlock even informed you of that matter.”

“Damnit Gundam…” Kazuichi Souda rubbed his hand as he looked at the two empty desks in the room. “So those two still aren’t coming huh?”

“Well Teach did say that Izzy and Nanami would be busy for a while!!!! Besides, Ibuki has already got her rockin’ apology already done and made into a CD!”

“How the hell did you get that done so quickly!?” Souda looked up from his paper to see the girl balancing on her desk chair in amusement, while he stared in horror at the girl’s energy and ability to balance so easily whilst wearing such thick boots.

“It’s not that hard to write one! Even I could do it for Hajimeme!” Akane Owari shouted from her own desk, in the middle of an arm-wrestling match with one Nekomaru Nidai.

“You know if you didn’t say such unseemly words or spread around those videos about thank handsome boy you wouldn’t even have to write an apology to begin with~” One Teruteru Hanmura, still hog tied in the corner, said teasingly much to Souda’s annoyance.

“I can understand why they might want to have someone who is essentially trash like me to write apologies for being around in the Main Course but I have to agree with Souda, I don’t understand why Ultimates such as yourselves need to bother with writing apologies to some Reserve Course student who thinks that he is just as good or better to stand alongside you. Really, they have such nerve to even need an apology? They should be begging you for forgiveness and giving an apology to all of you for getting their blood on the campus courtyard and causing such a commotion. And the fact that they still haven’t said anything or come back to school or even said a word is preposterous. Their family should be ashamed and-“

“Geez man shut the hell up!” The Ultimate Yakuza slammed his hand down on the desk on perpetrator of the long rant. “Komaeda I get you don’t like the Reserve Course but that is _Izuru_ Hinata’s twin brother and the guy is in a fucking coma! He can’t apologize even if he wanted to for fucks sake! On top of that he’s Natsumi’s only friend who by the way is _also_ in a coma and _also_ in the same class! You think that maybe, he and Natsumi were targeted because they had siblings in the Main Course!? Did it ever occur to you that Hinata was being bullied for so long that he wasn’t trying to cause trouble for Izuru!? I’m only going to say this once so get it through your thick skull. **THE WORLD DOESN’T REVOLVE AROUND YOUR IDEALS! SO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND WRITE YOUR DAMN APOLOGY!** “The small boy yelled at the taller, spring green eyes glaring into pale green eyes, a growl escaping his lips as the frown still seemed to be on Komaeda’s.

“Fine… I will attempt to come up with something.” The white-haired teen crossed his arms in frustration, pen in his hand snapping and spilling ink all over his and the Yakuza’s uniform in a black mess. “How unlucky…”

“You know what… I’m not even mad about the ink. I just want you two fucks to finish your goddamn letters and _actually_ be sincere about them so that maybe our Class Rep and our second resident prince of darkness will come back to class so Miss Yukizome will come back and teach us so we don’t have drunken Kizakura here for another day!”

“Young Ma- I mean Kuzuryu I believe he can’t hear you…” The grey-haired girl in braided twin-tails, with a visible bamboo sword at her side pointed at the shorter boy pointing at the man who was clearly still drunk on the floor with a hangover.

“Pekoyama, Komaeda, Souda; Kuzuryu d-does have a-a p-p-oint though. Y-you guys need to write a sincere a-apology if you want them to r-return.” Mikan Tsumiki said nervously, already starting to get teary eyed as all eyes were on her as she talked. “Eh.. I’m sorry!”

“Stop apologizing for every little thing you fat pig! Ugh ow you know what I can’t even deal with you today…” The Ultimate Traditional Dancer known as Hiyoko Saionji moaned in pain laying over her desk rubbing her arms in aches. “Even I think shitty stuff is too much. Only really wicked people do things like that to people. And I doubt that big brother really did anything to deserve all that shitty stuff happening to him.”

“See, besides her use of colorful language, even Yoko thinks that was wrong! And even if he is a boy he didn’t seem like he was terrible so even I thought he was okay.” Mahiru Koizumi fiddled with her camera nervously, polishing the lens carefully with a fine cloth but her mind looking far away. “Also… if you guys saw some of the things his class wrote about him, I don’t think you’d appreciate it if you were in his situation. Just some food for thought. Not everyone is as lucky as us and blessed with gifts…”

“And that is why-“

“For the love of god Nagito Komaeda shut up!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this section is so short DX


	3. From the view of an Ultimate Princess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sonia Nevermind recalls when all of this chaos occurred and what the phone call she listened to from her classmate did to stir up the feelings of one doll-like person in their class. 
> 
> Partly takes place during chapter 2 and then flashback.

Sonia Nevermind, the Ultimate Princess, who was one of the few people who remained quiet throughout this entire ordeal sighed in sadness. A pair of scissors in her bag were used earlier that day for an important reason that she wouldn’t be able to share. And the air of the classroom was filled with tension ever since Nanami and their Hinata had filled them in on what happened. At first it was just sadness from Nanami, which Sonia did her best to comfort the girl. One of her best friends was fighting for his life after sustaining so many injuries that he was on death’s door. Even the video games the girl was so famous for playing in class were left abandoned with her checking her cell phone instead at every break as if waiting for an update for the worst possible scenario.

And then there was their Hinata, Izuru Hinata, he was always so quiet, so gloomy and bored. He stuck to himself, and it took a lot of effort to get him involved into things outside of class. He would usually be sleeping in his free time, or reading through books with the same inexpressive visage on his face. But ever since Nanami revealed her and Hajime’s originally private messages, he had been… tense. She was certain Nidai and Gundam had noticed, with the possibility of Komaeda noticing as well; as for the others she was unsure but it was the slight changes in his expressions that really stood out to her that showed he was worried. His perfectly immaculate nails had teeth scrapings on them, the skin of his lips look like they had been bitten numerous times out of nervousness, the tapping on his thigh where he kept his cell phone waiting for a message, and the numerous knots in his long hair that he tried hiding by tying it up or back each day.

Yes, Izuru was under a lot of stress and not many people took notice of it, he was feeling guilty for what happened, it was written all over his pale expressionless face. Izuru failed at something hard for the first time in his life, and it was something that couldn’t be easily undone, and he was falling apart at the seams. Indeed, it started when his brother was injured but it spiraled when Nanami revealed everything.

* * *

“You know it ugh ugh it was go-going on for a while h-he said… He said before he met me that… that he’d ju-“ Nanami whimpered some more into her sweater sleeve, a box of tissues already being replaced with another one, Miaya Gekkogahara from Class 77-A rubbing the pink haired girls back in circles as she continued to talk in the small office space provided to the Ultimate Therapist, the quiet girl then handing the gamer a thick, plush angel bunny to hug while she continued, motioning the other to remain quiet.

“Thank you…He said that he didn’t have any friends there and that he’s just eating lunch alone. I was his first friend at school in a long time. He said that it was thu-the best thing that happened to him in a long time.” More tears dropped from Nanami’s face as her classmates could only look on in confusion and mixed responses of grief or surprise.

“It was fine for a while, and then he’d find his lunch was missing. Or his homework was stolen. His tests were corrected wrong. He’d be groped by the guys in P.E. for having a ‘chest like a girl’s despite being a guy’. He’d have graffiti on his desk every day no matter how many times he cleaned it. He’d get piles of work that wasn’t his, and that was meant for the teachers but as soon as he talked back, they would threaten to fail him. Even a project I helped him on we followed everything to the letter. There was no doubt he’d get a good grade and he was given the worst grade in the class. It made no sense why they were doing it. They did it because they didn’t like him. And then when Natsumi came h-he was the only one who didn’t sh-shun her. He and her were becoming friends. I was so happy. He was finally having someone in his class he could depend on and be with when I couldn’t be there with him. And then… and then…”

Nanami choked, covering her mouth and tears spilling out, as she no doubt remembered the day, they saw police in front of the Reserve Course Building. Natsumi was being rushed out on a stretcher and a few girls were in handcuffs walked off to be questioned by the police, yelling profanities as they stated the young Yakuza girl just got what she deserved; as the girl was bleeding out and on the verge of dying.

“We reported everything together. Every beating he got. Every act of violence inflicted unto other students like him as well. We reported it all but the teachers there didn’t seem to care. They said it was up to the students to work out their own issues. And Director Kirigiri never got back to us about the problems with the teachers either. When Hajime and I asked a few other classes, it turned out he wasn’t the only one being given work that was meant for the teachers to do. Or being given extra work or failing classes just because they didn’t want to do work that wasn’t required of them. People think the Reserve Course students pay a lot of money to have great funding and teaching but they don’t! They really don’t! The rooms are cold, the heating only goes on if they have guests, the rooms are suffocatingly dark, it feels like a prison! It’s like it’s filled with nothing but Despair! How can you call that a good environment for students to grow in! How can you call that a place for students whose families spent good money for them to go there only for them to be getting such poor conditions? It would have been better for them to go to any other school but Hope’s Peak! My Best Friend is dying because some people decided it would be a great idea to bully him. One of the few people in that entire course who still had Hope for the future to believe in something even though he was slowly losing it every day!” Nanami rubbed her eyes harder, them becoming too puffy and red for her to see out of properly with her tears continuing to make her glass-eyed.

“What do you mean by that Chiaki?” Miaya waved the arm of white rabbit in a magical girl costume at Nanami, in a cute voice, clearly meant more for a child, but seemed to let the teen let down her walls enough to pull out her cell phone.

“I recorded a c-call I had with him when he c-called me in the middle of the night. It was by accident b-but I ended up keeping it because…” Nanami wiped her eyes with her jacket sleeve as she just shook her head and allowed for the message to play:

[Chiaki’s iPhone ]

[Chiaki’s iPhone ] yaawwwwh Hinata what are you doing calling so late? We have school tomorrow silly…. *giggling*

[Hinata] *static noise*

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Hinata?

[Hinata] I-I’m sorry Nah-na-nanami I… I shouldn’t have called. I’ll hang up...

[Chiaki’s iPhone] …. Hinata what’s the matter *muffled sounds*

[Hinata] Nanami… would you…

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Would I what…? *increased intensity of voice*

[Hinata] Would you miss me if I … you know…. Wasn’t here anymore?

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Are you saying you have to switch schools? * vocal tone and intensity drops*

[Hinata] No… I meant like…

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Like what…?

[Hinata]…. *rustling on other end of line*

[Hinata] if I died…

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Wh-what do you mean like if you died!? Of course, I would! You’re my best friend! My partner in crime all things video game related, you’re my first real friend in a long time. *Intense yelling followed soft tone* So to answer your question… of course I’d miss you. So please whatever it is you’re thinking I beg you not to do it.

[Hinata] I’m not thinking about anything well no that’s wrong. I guess you can say I’m sick of everything and not sure what to do… I just… I don’t… am I really that useless? Do I deserve to be hated so much? I don’t think I should be but…. Everything around me seems to point to that. My teachers, my classmates, hell even my own family seems to treat my own existence as a fucking burden Nanami! WHAT SHOULD I DO WHEN EVERYONE JUST TELLS ME TO FUCK OFF AND DIE! *Heavy breathing and static*

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Hinata a-are you crying? Do you need me over there? *rustling and static* I can be there soon… the Reserve Course Dorms aren’t far from mine. I can be there in ten minutes, I think…

[Hinata] NO! PLEASE! DON’T!

[Chiaki’s iPhone]….

[Hinata] I ALREADY LOOK PATHETIC ENOUGH AS IT IS, I DON’T NEED ANOTHER REASON FOR IZURU TO…. *Heavier breathing and sound of something breaking* FUCK!

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Hinata! What was that!? I heard something break.

[Hinata] *rustling sound of phone being moved* Damn it I broke a plate and cut my hand. DAMN IT! THIS IS JUST FUCKING GREAT!

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Hinata please let me just come over there!

[Hinata] Why? So you can see the fucking Reserve Course Student crying his eyes out for the who knows how many time over how pathetic his existence is? How no matter how hard he tries he’s never good enough to do anything. How his teachers, classmates and family all tell him to just stop trying to do things because he’s got no talents and it’s just easier for him to give up! How his twin brother is so good at everything, how his IDENTICAL TWIN IS SO FUCKING GREAT THAT YOU MIGHT AS WELL NOT EXIST. HOW NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY, NO MATTER WHAT FUCKING THING YOU DO HE CAN ALWAYS DO IT BETTER AND HE’S JUST LAZY AND BORED SO HE JUST HAS NO MOTIVATION TO DO ANY OF IT! HOW DESPITE BEING A GENIUS HE STILL CAN’T FIGURE OUT THAT BOTH OF US PROBABLY HAVE CLINICAL DEPRESSION AND OUR PARENTS ARE NEGLECTING US GETTING TREATED FOR IT BECAUSE THEY ARE AFRAID IT WILL RUIN HIS GENIUS! DO YOU REALLY WANT TO SEE THAT NANAMI!? *short staggered and rapid breathing*

[Chiaki’s iPhone]….

[Chiaki’s iPhone] Hinata…

[Hinata] Oh fucking god Nanami I’m sorry I-

[Chiaki’s iPhone] I’ll be there in five open your door.

[Chiaki’s iPhone] 02:23 am

-call ended 10:05 minutes-


	4. An Ultimate Neurologists Problems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we have Yasuke Matsuda's POV and how he views everything that has happened around him, and unfortunately the feelings he's still not sure how to process

Yasuke Matsuda, Ultimate Neurologist, genius extraordinaire in all things regarding the brain and nervous system. When he was admitted to Hope’s Peak Academy, the first thing they did was assign him not one, but two very annoying patients much to his annoyance and displeasure. Both were thankfully not in his class, but both were very, very much annoying. Nagito Komaeda, this year’s Ultimate Lucky Student, with Stage 3 Lymphoma that the school had better be treating in his opinion, and who had developed some neurological deficits apparently, among some bothersome obsessions about Hope versus Despair that they apparently wanted to see if it affected the brain in any regard, to which he thought might actually be beneficial when it came to a certain childhood friend of his whom had similar obsessions and was hoping to cure her of such problematic diseased thoughts. Then there was Izuru Hinata, the Ultimate “Hope” of the Academy they assigned to him after the school had found out that the teenager simply had no drive to do much of anything but sleep; even eating, hydrating, and bathing seemed to be a chore to the kid and he had to be reminded that he had to do it in order to function.

Yasuke remembered hearing in passing that the lazy Ultimate had a twin brother in the Reserve Course but he didn’t meet the kid until one day the mop head decided to take up a bed in his office space to sleep and it was getting late; far too late for Yasuke to be at the school and he was not going to carry someone taller than him and probably heavier than him to the dorms. And it was too troublesome to have the security guard reprimand him for leaving a patient in his lab by themselves again. So when the Eldritch Abomination of a teenager received a phone call but refused to answer it, feeling the need to fling the cellular device at the neurologist instead, Yasuke found himself giving directions to someone on the other end of the line, hearing what sounded like Sakakura punching the kid before listening to the explanation, and then coming eye to eye with Hajime Hinata, Reserve Course student, twin brother, and an idiot he held mixed feelings toward.

“Sorry about my brother. He must have caused you a lot of trouble. Is there anything I can-“

“Stop the lip flapping and get the lazy bum out of my lab so I can lock up would be all I need you for.” Yasuke threw the mobile at the chestnut-haired teen, who fumbled with the phone, nearly dropping it before pocketing it, nodding mutely and going to collect his brother.

“Come on Izuru. I have to get to the store before the sale ends and you sleeping isn’t going to help me get there!” The boy shook the unconscious teen, who muttered something around the lines of ‘it won’t matter you’ll miss it anyhow’

“Damnit Izuru this is the fourth time this week you’ve caused me trouble! I’m never going to get grocery shopping at this rate and some of us don’t get a nice meal plan policy when we dorm!” He shook harder, the aggression in his voice rising, any polite meekness that he was putting on when he first met Yasuke was already gone, ignoring the fact that the neurologist was still in the room or completely forgetting it.

“Izuru I swear to god get the fuck up! I need to go shopping and I’m not getting your damn Sakura mochi if you keep sleeping!”

“Hajime, you are going to give yourself a headache if you continue yelling like that. Also if you wanted me to get up earlier a better way to wake me up would have been to bribe me earlier with food and not use the excuse that I was causing you to be late to missing a mediocre market deal.” Izuru cracked an eye open, taking Hajime’s hand off of his uniform, and pushing himself off of the bed.

“Goodbye Matsuda. I’ll be taking my leave now. Sorry about my brother causing any problems.” He got up and moved in a swift motion out the door, with Hajime quickly bowing and following suit, yelling profanities about how Izuru was the issue.

Yes, Yasuke’s opinion of Hajime was mixed… he believed the boy to be somewhat of an idiot the more he heard about him from either Izuru, or others on campus. He seemed to work hard with little reward. He followed talent blindly like a puppy. He wasn’t a sycophant but he wasn’t someone whom he could consider on the same level as an Ultimate despite the latter’s wishes to be like them. He seemed like a disillusioned idiot and it bothered him to no end when he did have to interact with him. That is until he started seeing signs of depression really kicking into high gear so to speak with the other twin. He had to admit he was curious to see how long it would take for them to develop in Hajime when he first talked with Miaya Gekkogahara, the Ultimate Therapist, and his classmate about it. Both were in agreement on how Izuru had most likely been experiencing clinical depression for some time now and how they would observe him to see if it was getting worse or not. And like most studies, observational or otherwise, they still needed a control, and twin studies were still somewhat of a rarity so they thought the plain, average as can be twin would be fine.

Clearly, they were both wrong as their own informants in the Reserve Course seemed to have nothing but fun talking about how many people in the kid’s class would torment the twin while he would just sit and take it. Yasuke would silently observe each time Hajime would come for Izuru and each tug of the boy’s collar and tie as if he was either choking or suffocating; the stress clearly making it harder for him to properly breathe. The dark circles under his eyes were not strangers to Yasuke either, as someone who was constantly up late either studying or reading manga late at night because insomnia kicked in, he could tell the kid didn’t get much sleep; not even the concealer Hajime used could cover up circles that dark. Even the bag the kid carried with him seemed to grow heavier by the day, filled with more reference books than should be carried by one person. He didn’t look healthy, and Izuru either didn’t seem to notice or didn’t bother to care. The Reserve Course building had clearly turned this obsessive puppy into something similar to that of a drained workplace drone in less than six months and it left Yasuke with a sour taste in his mouth. He didn’t like getting involved with many people. People were troublesome, they were stupid, they liked to leech off of each other, they betray each other, they are pitiful, weak, and he… he was just as human as that kid.

So, for the second time that fall when he heard sirens calls of ambulances and police cars heading toward the courtyard of the school it piqued his curiosity. He had heard reports of many Reserve Course students being attacked lately, the event with Natsumi Kuzuryu being the biggest one, and the event that caused the first influx of ambulances needing to come to campus that fall. This time however it seemed too close to the fountain that was between campuses and nowhere near the usual spots for ‘hunting’, but it didn’t really matter where it happened, it just ended up being more of a headache for him if Komaeda was the one involved. Knowing the boy’s disdain for the Reserve Course he had suspected a few times that to be the case, but it seemed he was wrong on multiple accounts. This time too when he opened his phone to call the white-haired teen, he expected like clockwork to receive a phone call explaining how whatever was going on was not his fault. But instead of Komaeda, his heart stopped when he got a call from Izuru flashing across his screen instead. The Izuru fucking Hinata of all people telling him he needed to skip his appointment with the neurologist because he was needed for questioning by the authorities. His tone was flat, dead, unemotive, nothing different than usual but it made Yasuke more unnerved. Normally someone should be afraid, upset, emotional, any kind of response, but Izuru despite telling Yasuke needed to talk to the police seemed as if he was telling the young doctor that he was running to the store to buy candy. He wouldn’t find out later the reason why he was taken away for questioning, but it didn’t matter in the end. Izuru’s behavior started to make Yasuke worry for the first time especially when he started becoming more talkative a couple weeks later…

“Matsuda would you be interested in having sex with me?”

“Pfahs haphs hack. What the hell Izuru!” Matsuda spit out his drink one afternoon as Izuru spent yet another day hiding away in his neurology lab.

“Is that really an appropriate response to my question.” Izuru said with his usual serious but deadpan expression; to Yasuke however he clearly looked like his mind was is other places.

“What is wrong with your brain!? I’m dating someone you know!” Yasuke wiped the spilled drink off of his mouth and began cleaning up the splatter it made, muttering curses as he would have to dry many of these papers off.

“You and her barely talk, when you do it sounds like she goes between being manic about loving you passionately and wanting you to be dead so she can get euphoric about your death. She doesn’t sound like someone you should spend your time dating, much less someone you should spend time with to relieve your sexual urges upon. If I were to hazard a guess… I would say that she is a very calculating individual with a high analytical skill not unlike myself. Your attachment to her is most likely because she’s your childhood friend and not out of any real romantic attraction toward her. Besides, I was offering a friend with benefits scenario more than anything else. “ Izuru drawled, playing with his hair yet again; as Yasuke noticed, his hair seemed to be filled with knots, and his perfectly pristine clothing looked as if he had been sleeping in them for quite some time.

“When was the last time you changed you fucking clothes you dip shit?” Yasuke pushed himself off of his wheeled chair, hitting the desk with a thump just as he grabbed the dark-haired brunet by the collar and brought him down to eye level. “Blegh you smell too, just because your damn twin is in the hospital doesn’t mean you can forget about hygiene you moron!”

“Geez what is he going to say when he wakes up and sees his twin wearing dirty clothes all of the time, smelling like garbage, and probably looking emaciated because he forgets to eat since it’s too much of a bother to cook. Not to mention that rats nest you call your hair, the amount of knots you have in it you’d be better off cutting most of it off at this rate than-“

“He’s not going to wake up” Izuru said solemnly, in the deadest seriousness, that Yasuke released his grasp from the boy’s collar almost immediately as he said it just from the shock alone.

“Where the hell did you hear that? All of the reports I’ve gotten haven’t said anything about-“

“It’s been more than two weeks, with each passing day of him being in a coma and not waking up the chances of him waking up decrease. Tomorrow will mark the beginning of week four believe it or not, and since there hasn’t been any change in his brain activity the likelihood of him awakening as I said is further decreasing with each passing day. As it stands, I predict he has a five percent chance of waking up at the moment taking into account the extent of his injuries and head trauma he received that day. I don’t think there is much hope in him waking up Matsuda….” Izuru said, methodically, clinically, rehearsed, as if he practiced this numerous times just to tell Yasuke despite the chances of that being almost zero.

“You… You … YOU DOLT! You’re having a crisis! You’re feeling lonely, and instead of just asking me to keep you company because you want some sappy shoulder to cry on, and gross shit to do you, instead ask me for sex!? I’d rather you ask me to be all mushy and talk about our feelings! At least then I can get you to talk about your problems instead of you hiding your insecurities and depression from yourself! Just stop thinking about all the negatives for once in your goddamn life and have a little hope and believe in that goddamn twin of yours that he will wake up! Even if it takes me months or hell years. I am Yasuke **FUCKING** Matsuda the Ultimate Neurologist! If those morons and you say he won’t wake up I will find a way for him to wake up!” Yasuke clenched and unclenched his fists several times, gritting his teeth, and tried to calm his breathing as he felt hot and flustered after that outburst.

He was finding it difficult to meet eyes with the other Hinata twin in front of him, for if he did, he would probably notice the wide-eyed expression, as if he was a deer caught in headlights, confused for the first time in a while on what to do. It wasn’t something Izuru had experienced often, and he was well aware of that. The fact that he surprised Izuru to the point of being speechless was in fact something to take note upon. With a huff Yasuke turned on his heel toward his desk where he gathered what little snacks remained in his desk drawers, the spare manga he brought with him to school and the several stacks of papers scattered about. The ring of keys being one of the last things to grab before pulling Izuru by the wrist, jolting the taller teen forward and out of whatever trance he was put in as they proceeded to head out of the lab and lock up for the night.

“Listen we are going to the school’s bathhouse getting this mess of your hair as detangled as possible, then we are going to pick up Miaya from her meeting at the clinic downtown where she volunteers with the kids, go out and have a nice dinner just the three of us, and then we are all going to one of our dorm rooms and having a nice long talk about this crisis Hinata, because frankly it’s driving me nuts watching you self-destruct on a regular basis and this…” Yasuke motioned to Izuru’s disheveled appearance and blatant lack of self-care. “Is worse than just my lack of sleep due to insomnia. You _need_ to let us help you. If not as doctors at least as… _blegh_ friends…” Yasuke made a mild face of disgust, the sappiness of the words coming from his mouth being too sweet for his liking and something he wasn’t used to expressing in a long while.

“You don’t make sense, doing all of this won’t change the fact that Hajime is…” Izuru’s voice slightly quivered, streams of tears were already starting to fall down his face, and despite his expression still seeming the same as ever his voice and fact that he was crying was more than enough for Yasuke to pull the taller boy into a one armed hug.

“Come on let’s get going… I’m sure you don’t want to be here any longer than necessary…”


	5. Do not underestimate Miaya's Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miaya Gekkogahara is someone everyone thought of as just a childish girl, it worked to her advantage for more ways than one

Miaya Gekkogaha , the Ultimate Therapist of Class 77-A, and the girl known to love stuff animals even into highschool was a strange individual to most people. Even when you met her for the first time you would often be fooled at first into believing she was still a child. She had difficult growing ever since she had an accident when she was younger and lost most mobility with her legs relaying mostly on a wheelchair or crutches in most cases to get around properly. She used her cute, innocent, and child-like appearance though to her advantage when necessary; such being the cases when children needed someone to talk to that they could easily trust, and another child was usually more trustworthy than an adult to them in most cases. Other times she used this appearance to get people to let down their guard enough for them to accept medical help and prevent many suicides from happening, as these individuals didn’t want to die in front of a child. Yes, she would use her appearance to her advantage when the need arose, and one such need arose when she was in the waiting room of the hospital where Hajime Hinata was currently being treated for his extensive amount of injuries; and where his parents had only just showed up after weeks of trying to contact them with no real time line of when they’d be able to come see their son.

“Hewwo~ My name is Usami. It’s vewy nice to meet ~ou owo” Miaya held up here plush rabbit in front of her face, waving it’s arms shyly and looking above the plush with practiced doe eyes that immediately had Mrs. Hinata by the heartstrings the moment she spoke.

“Why hello Usami. And who is your darling friend?” The older woman said with a smile, chuckling a little as she shook the plush rabbit’s paw.

“Thwiss is Miaya. She is my Bwestist fwiend~” Miaya went up an octave and waved the plush around to give the impression that the rabbit was twirling around like a ballerina. 

“Hello…” Miaya said quietly, making sure her voice was barely above a whisper, doing so would ensure that the older woman would pay more attention to what she was saying and hold more control over their discussion if she was lucky.

“Why are you here little girl?” Mrs. Hinata asked curiously, not even noticing the frown forming on Miaya’s face as she tried to keep back from yelling choice words at the seemingly careless mother in front of her.

“My big brother got beat up by some bad people at school and got hurt really badly. We are here to visit him today but when I saw him, I started crying and was told to wait out here. When I asked how it happened and why bad people did this Momma and Papa said he was being bullied…” Miaya made sure to tighten her grip on the stuffed rabbit and start crying; not that it was hard for her to do, as someone as empathetic as she was, she truly was devastated when she saw the photos of the poor Reserve Course Student and seeing in person how poorly his twin brother has been reacting to this entire event thus far.

“I’m sorry to hear that sweetheart. You know my son got really hurt like that too but it’s not like he’s in that grave of danger. If anything, it just seems like he’s been putting a burden on his poor brother. The poor thing hasn’t been sleeping or eating well since he’s been in the hospital. I hope he wakes up soon so he can stop being such a burden already…” The woman shook her head, causing Miaya to bite her lip down in frustration, unfortunately she was dealing with the type of parent she disliked the most, the ones who tended to favor one child while not even realizing they were neglecting the other.

“What do you mean he’s not in gwave danger?” Miaya said in her Usami voice once again, looking at her innocently enough to catch the older woman off guard, almost as if she forgot she was talking to a ‘small child’ in front of her.

“Oh well I mean he’s just sleeping is all. Like in that story Sleeping Beauty or Snow White where the princesses are in a really deep sleep and they can’t wake up on their own because of a curse. It’s kind of like that…” The mother laughed a little awkwardly, as if trying to cover up a mistake, well in Miaya’s point of view letting out any delicate information to a strange girl was a mistake to begin with but she wasn’t going to acknowledge the woman’s blunder as carelessness when she purposely was prying for information. 

“Oh... So he’s just sweeping then? I hope he wakes up swoon so he can pway with everyone again!!!” She waved around Usami in an excited motion, causing the woman to giggle a bit before responding shyly herself.

“My big brother wakes up sometimes but the doctors said he won’t be able to walk well just like me. And he needs a lot of attention. Mommy and Daddy and I have to work hard so he can play with everyone and draw and talk normally again. What about your son?” She looked up Mrs. Hinata eyes wide with curiosity, to an outsider it would look just like a curious child wondering about information, to her friends and colleagues they all knew she was waiting carefully for what the parent was about to say, observing for any lies that may come from their mouths.

“Of course, we will be doing the same thing~” She said with a smile, and with that Miaya put on her biggest, most forced smile she had to put on in a long time.

“That’s great!” She said quietly, her smile reaching ear to ear but her jaw was clenched, her muscles in her face were tight, and she couldn’t help but want to cry; that woman was such a liar.

“Dear I found the doctor in charge of Hajime… and some kid who apparently is on his case too. What do they just let anyone be a doctor nowadays?” A man with darker brown hair came walking down the hallway, a tired looking nurse walking behind him who’s eyes lit up when she saw Miaya.

“Ah Miss Miaya I was looking everywhere for you Doctor Hiroshi and Doctor Matsuda wanted to talk to you about-“

“Ah Nuwse Shinon it’s about Miaya’s big bwother right?” Miaya held up Usami in front of the nurse, cocking the bunny’s head off to the side as if to act confused, and still playing into her innocent act as to not draw any suspicious from Mrs. Hinata, or her husband who had now just appeared.

“Ahh... yes your brother is awake now and the doctors wanted me to tell you that you can go see him with Usami if you like. I had to bring Mr. Hinata over this way anyhow and was told you’d be waiting here, so if you are ready to walk with me, I can hold Usami while we get to your brother’s room. Does that sound good?”

“Yes, that sound…. nice..” Miaya said softly, holding out the bunny plush for the nurse to hold, the woman seeming to be quick up on the uptake, impressing Miaya greatly as she hasn’t seen Miaya play the role of an ‘innocent child’ to gather information on people before; a small smile on her face genuinely given toward the woman as she moved away for Miaya to grab her crutches.

“I have to get going now Mister Hinata and Missus Hinata, it was nice talking with you. I hope your son gets better soon…” Miaya gave a smile that seemed sweet, her teal-green hair and eyes seeming to sparkle in the luminescent light of the hospital but to anyone who knew she was still putting on the air that she was alright with this short introduction to one of the two people who were neglecting their children.

“Bye dear. Hope things go well!” The woman waved goodbye, the man besides her already bending down to talk to her when he thought the two were out of ear shot.

“What was that all about?”

“Oh nothing, just some little girl whose brother is probably in the Reserve Course like Hajime. I just told her some stuff so she’d be placated. Like how we’d be helping Hajime recover and all of that.” She sighed, also exasperated at the thought of having to do such work.

“Seriously? You know with our jobs we don’t have that kind of time, technically even being here is wasting time that we could be using to be at a meeting. It’s not like money for that school grows on trees you know. We work all of this overtime and this is how he repays us is by causing trouble at school. Unbelievable…”

“Well you know Izuru wouldn’t have accepted going there if Hajime didn’t go there along with him dear.” The man’s wife said with a sigh, “I swear that boy has his brother wrapped around his finger using him like that. Instead of telling Izuru to listen to us and go the Hope’s Peak by himself he goes off and just says he’s going to a different school and Izuru decides he’s going to follow him. How irresponsible.”

“And then he has the nerve to get so injured on top of it, I can’t wait to see how much this will cost on top of that school bill. He’s not even going to be attending and we are going to have to pay? This is just ridiculous. Honestly, isn’t there some way we can move him to a cheaper hospital or something?” The man said bitterly, the sound coming from the small speaker on Matsuda’s desk made Miaya’s skin crawl.

Miaya knew the troubles of money with going to Hope’s Peak’s Reserve Course program. She saw it every day on the faces of the students who’d come to and from that building. And despite her pleas to the security team to let in those students to receive therapy from her all she got from them and the vice-principal of the school were remarks of how someone as talented as her should volunteer her time to those who really need it. Even then, the amount of work needed for her to get clinical hours with her mentor at a downtown clinic was like pulling teeth without any Novocain to numb the pain. Hearing all of this was making her want to rip her ears off with all of the slander and accusations. Her heart was feeling phantom pains of being stabbed. Yes, Miaya felt how much favoritism they had toward the one twin and not the other and it hurt her deep inside the more she listened. The device she had kept hidden on the table in the waiting room long before the mother had even shown up had been recording everything this entire time. Every word, every noise, and reverberation of what was going on around them, and it was all to painful for her heart to bare. Miaya couldn’t believe such ignorance existed among her friends’ family but had no other choice but to accept it.

People would rather live in ignorance than face the mess they’ve made indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Miaya doesn't have an older brother in case anyone was confused, she was lying about it because it was easier to fool others, the nurses at the hospital that know of her at told to be aware if she starts talking to them in a peculiar way that they should just try to pick up whatever the girl was talking about and go along with it.


	6. Chiaki's troubles and Twitch Streams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chiaki Nanami is trying her best at least that's what she hopes in this dreadful time.

The PC hummed when she turned it on, the fans already kicking in high gear for when she was about to play her game. Her headphones glowed a light purple, the cat ear headset adjusted properly to her liking and all of the voice and audio controls in perfect order. Set-up complete in a matter of minutes as she punched away at her keyboard, her sleepy eyes blinking as she decided which games she’d play for stream that day. The backer bar for donations had gone up overnight to her surprise, not by much but it was something. She already completed Miss Yukizome’s assignments and gave her the set-up instructions for the winter projects the class should do, as well as the student council notes. With her work done she could do a 24-hour stream tomorrow if she paced herself well enough today. Her Twitter and Instagram followers seemed to be down for one. Whether it was because of her skills or because of her comfy clothing style giving her a ‘cute’ look, she didn’t really care about it. As long as they were enjoying the game with her that’s all that mattered. Super Mario was a classic but it had too many versions and sequels for her to decide on her own which would be best. The Legend of Zelda Series was always popular too but had the same issue. This time she was thinking of trying out some of the dating sim games that were considered ‘cute’ and maybe some of the horror games her audience have been suggesting instead of the other suggestions that she had gotten in her box lately. Some of them were asking her to join the retro gaming trend that was going on, which wasn’t a bad idea, but when they suggested Gala Omega… she had to decline and take a break from stream. Tears forming in her eyes when more and more people were demanding her to play the space shooter game when she didn’t give a satisfactory answer why she wouldn’t play it despite her hair clips, Twitch page and streamer page all had Gala Omega merchandise plastered everywhere showing her love of the classic game.

“Hello everyone it’s the Ultimate Gamer Chiaki Nanami. I’m happy to answer any questions before stream today. And tomorrow I may do a 24-hour stream… at least I think I will.” She said thoughtfully, as she did have to keep reminding herself to pace herself.

[g@ymerlife04]: Why are you so free to do streams again? Just wondering cuz u only did it like twice a month when you started @ HPA

“Ah well something happened recently and I haven’t been in the mood to go to class. Let’s just say my class really upset me about something and my teacher said to take a break.”

[SugarLieff00001]: Wow must be nice to be able to skip class whenever you want

[KissyKiss___OWO]: Oh come on she goes to HPA I heard they can do whatever so long as they work on their talent. Which she is by streaming game >;3

[SugarLieff00001]: Whatever… g8t for u I guess…

[KingdomHearts<3]: So I just noticed this buuuuut what’s with the donation bar?

“Ah well Like KissyKiss Said I’m working on my talent so the school doesn’t have an issue with it, and KingdomHearts my friend was hurt recently so it’s a donation to help his family pay for any medical bills and such, his brother is in my class but he’s not…” Chiaki said trying to ignore the pang of guilt she felt for skipping class, but she was still too upset with her classmates to attend, and she knew Izuru was doing the same for more reasons than one.

[Cookie_MON_ster]: Wait so who’s this friend? I thought the Main Course students got covered for shit like that? What was he in the Reserve Course or some shit?

[Pompompuddun’]: Hey don’t knock the HPA RC!

[CUTIE_HONEY_PIE]: Aren’t all the people who go to the RC rich? Why TF should you be helping him with money!?

“It’s not like that! Not everyone there has a lot of money and… he worked really hard while in there. So please don’t mock the Reserve Course or my mods will have you kicked out.” Chiaki said desperately, trying not to sound too angry but still quite upset at the comments some of the people were making.

[ULT_PRGRMER_CHI]: Please be aware that at this time our streamer Chiaki Nanami is going through a lot of emotional grief so jabs about her friend is not appreciated. I will not hesitate to block anyone who decides to harass either our streamer or others in chat.

[Cookie_MON_ster]: Cool IRT . Iwasnt meaning it like that!

[Cookie_MON_ster]: *COOL IT!

[Cookie_MON_ster]: I just didn’t want her “friend” draining money from her like some @$$

[GRAYM00NDY]: That’s pathetic hiding behind your mods

[Pikle_OOOOOOOH]: Come on leave her alone!

**_[Pikle_OOOOOOOH has donated 2500 yen to donation to “HH HOPE FUND”_ **

[Pikle_OOOOOOOH]: Hey sorry it isn’t much, only can make so much as a broke college student but hope this helps at least a little bit!

[Pikle_OOOOOOOH]: Also I have class in like 10 minutes so I could only stay for a bit. I’ll hop on l8tr bye~

“Hehe Thanks piccolo for the donation. And don’t be sorry. I think it’s important to only donate what you can anyhow. No amount is too little. I do appreciate it. So… in honor of piccolo’s donation I think we will play this DBZ dating sim that’s supposed to be really funny. I’ll even let you guys choose the route we take. Sound fun?” Chiaki said, trying to recover with a small smile, just happy that there was at least one person out there today who didn’t like the bad rep people were trying to give the Reserve Course.

**_[Pikle_OOOOOOOH sent a private message: Hey kiddo good luck with stream today! With love from your favorite cousin <3] _ **

After her moderators started filtering comments Chiaki felt everything calm down within her. The tension and the anxiety seeming to slip away so she could focus once again on what she wanted to do that day. The message from her close friend, her family member as it was, made things seem to dissipate as well. They understood how difficult it was for Chiaki to be going through such troubling times essentially by herself as she was far from home as they too had experienced the loneliness of separation from their family. And the donation, no matter how small it was made her quite happy that someone didn’t see this as her wasting her time or money on someone who they thought was undeserving of it. Even now she wished that she could do more, more than just live streaming for some extra money to help with her friend. More than just words to comfort the other twin as he suffered in his own version of silence. Neither of them had much power for they were still nothing but children and the amount they could do to help was always limited by others above them. It really made Chiaki wish there was some other way around to help in this seemingly helpless situation but for now all she could do was just hope for the best.

“Okay guys ready to play some DBZ dating sims?” She said with a smile, her work was about to begin and she had to pull through somehow even if it seemed like she would crack at the worst possible moment she had to try her best.


	7. Into Izuru's Mind Part 1: The Ignorant Genius

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izuru's thoughts when everything he knew started to take a turn, and when things started to not make sense anymore. 
> 
> How had he been so ignorant to the one person who should be closer to him than anyone else?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for the kudos and the comments. It makes me happy that people are interested in this self-indulgent fan-fiction. And I haven't a clue as to why others enjoy me putting everyone through suffering. 
> 
> Now Izuru's chapters are going to be kind of... interesting. I sort of wrote these off of my ADHD meds so there's that too. 
> 
> I'm sorry out there to everyone who doesn't like how I wrote Izuru this chapter. I'm working on it but I wanted it to seem like Izuru does have some form of depression and he tends to disregard himself, and by extension other people's feelings, not because he's emotionless versus he doesn't know how to comprehend what he's feeling. 
> 
> Idea is he's conditioned to logically analyze things and knows what reactions can happen and why they happen but doesn't know how to respond to them appropriately. 
> 
> If that doesn't make sense I'm sorry ^^""

Izuru found himself feeling more detached from the world each day he woke up. Every day was so excruciatingly boring, that he couldn’t even be bored to tears instead it made him sleepy. Nothing seemed to interest him most days, nor motivate him, that’s just how his life was since he started finding less and less joy in doing things. With talent comes the responsibility to hone that talent and make oneself greater for it. At least that is the mantra that had been drilled into not only his head but his brother’s since they were small children. Back in a time where Izuru and his twin Hajime really didn’t know the cruelty of the world and how they focused so much on talent to the point where it became suffocating.

Izuru seemed to pick up anything quickly soon after it was given to him. Give him a bike, he was riding it within a day without any issues, give him extremely difficult mathematics problems, he’d have calculus equations down within a week. Give him a cook book and he could tell you everything wrong with the grammar, punctuation, spelling and how the cook book was wrong in only a few hours. He was a prodigy, a genius, and as some people liked to put it a savant. His twin Hajime on the contrary was much slower to pick things up and he couldn’t master them to the degree that Izuru could. He was very much versatile in various subjects but didn’t excel in necessarily one. He could cook without burning anything but he wouldn’t be able to tell you what seasonings were superior than others. He was something more akin to a jack of all trades master of none, mediocre in many things as some liked to put it despite him being well above average in many of the things he did, but Izuru wasn’t going to bother arguing with others who didn’t seem to appreciate the efforts his brother put into everyday tasks. It wasn’t his battle to fight so he always assumed if Hajime was complaining that it was just over some petty attention he wanted. He didn’t see the need for Hajime to even do it either, having attention on you all of the time was endlessly tiring.

So, when Hajime got into a high school that was as good as Hope’s Peak Academy Izuru thought maybe things would be alright. Maybe it would be fine for him to do what he wanted for once instead of what was expected of him, of both of them. The more people from Hope’s Peak Academy talked to him months before it would be decided which high school he would go to, the more he wanted to avoid Hope’s Peak. The expectations of him would be to do everything to improve his “talent” for the sake of “improving the world” as it would be. He just found the idea all too bothersome to deal with so he just decided to say something to avoid going to school there if at all possible. It sounded boring to go to school just to improve talent, nothing would be interesting for him there, everyone there would be so predictable and it would be a lot less tolerable without his brother there with him. Even if Hajime couldn’t help him get rid of this endless boredom he was surrounded by, his twin’s company was helpful with making things more tolerable. So, when he said he didn’t want to be separated from Hajime in school, his parents’ expectations for him and Hajime had risen exceedingly.

It started with the two of them forcing Hajime to give up his scholarship and high achievements on the entrance exam for his preferred school in favor for the Reserve Course at Hope’s Peak Academy. A course he was sure would put nothing but more pressure on Hajime as the semester would continue forward. The next was when Hajime suddenly became “responsible” for Izuru’s lack of caring for going to Hope’s Peak and telling the other teen that Izuru’s well-being and future were dependent if he went to Hope’s Peak or not; despite Izuru’s decision being ignored. When both were essentially forced to go to the prodigious school, Izuru felt a bit of contempt for his twin’s lack of willpower to oppose the two parental figures. Not that he could say anything about it aloud, as he caved to Hajime’s pleas when the twin came to his room in the middle of the night in tears just asking Izuru to go through with it. So, when the two had found themselves within the dormitories of separate buildings Izuru just rolled his eyes at the large room he was given for himself. The large studio room clearly meant for the talented members of Hope’s Peak Academy to have enough space to do what they were specialized in; a waste of excess space where both him and his brother could have just shared but the school insisted that he’d be better off alone. When he asked his parents if they were in charge of this arrangement, as he was nighty-nine percent certain they told the school to separate the twins, their only response seemed to be if Hajime was complaining about it. Seeing it pointless to argue with them and too much work to correct them on such ridiculous things he just told them to forget about what he said and hung up. Apparently, these expectations didn’t stop at just his parents however as the Director of the school Jin Kirigiri eventually stuck him in some kind of forced ‘therapy’ of sorts with the Ultimate of Neurologist of 77-A not long after school started.

“So, what the fuck is wrong with you besides being depressing as fuck!?” The neurologist, Yasuke Matsuda, a fairly attractive teenager said to him with the sharpest tone possible that it made it seem like the doctor was the edgy teenager among the two of them.

“Nothing is wrong with me, the fact that the teachers assume so is just a mistake on their part. I simply have no interest in many of the tasks that they make me do. Why should I bother with something if the answer is so obvious to me? I’d rather just sleep than deal with the projects that they think would interest me, so the fact that they sent me to you is probably just their idea of screwing with you or thinking you’d be able to understand the way the mind of a child prodigy among prodigies work…” Izuru said with a boring tone, picking at the dirt that seemed to get under his nails absent-mindedly.

“Wow… the Ultimate Hope himself in person~ How luck it is that I get to spend time with you despite being so unworthy to share even more of your time than necessary.” A white haired boy from his class, one Nagito Komaeda, had opened the door of the Neurology Lab with an air of delight at seeing the long haired teen.

“Ugh I forgot that they were making me deal with two headaches…” Matsuda had grit his teeth in annoyance, as he ushered the white-haired teen in so he could start setting up a MRI for the boy who had Stage 3 lymphoma; Izuru knew this because he had read through the medical records of everyone in his class when he was bored, and then proceeded to make it look like he didn’t hack into the medical records by updating the security for the school; it was a task he wished was more fulfilling but it really didn’t matter in the end.

That’s just how the days ended up going for Izuru on repeat, he’d wake up or get woken by his twin, eat a mediocre breakfast, go to class or whatever he was required to do for the day, maybe go sleep in Matsuda’s office and go home. At some point he’d noticed how he would find himself in the Neurologist’s lab often just to spend time or nap, eventually leading Hajime coming to grab him on multiple occasions; turns out that Matsuda had locked him in the room on purpose before and he was getting the young doctor in trouble for not bothering to leave at a decent time. He hasn’t really bothered to care for the other student’s distress as it seemed like the teen was more annoyed with the potential of getting banned from his lab than any well-being Izuru had. They were a unique friendship of sorts that was always on a thin line between what could be considered actual friendship or something else entirely. Izuru knew of the various forms of friendship individuals could attain however no words seemed to fit well for Matsuda and himself, nor when their friend Miaya was involved. She was an enigma to him as to how she fit into the picture of friendship with both himself and Matsuda. She inserted herself into his life one day and then she never left. That was the essence of Miaya Gekkogahara when it came to her place in his life and he just saw no reason why he should make any effort to change something; like her peaked curiosity of geniuses she was always hanging around.

Izuru’s days were filled with a type of mediocrity that he wished he could indulge himself in like a normal person. He had a sort of envy for his twin in that regard, whether he would admit it or not, that he could live such daily life without the ever-present boredom that plagued his mind as a disease. It would be less numbing and more fulfilling of a life, but he knew his twin’s reaction to this sort of phrase. Hajime would bite back, tongue sharp, and have nothing but rude remarks about how Izuru was disregarding his feelings about being a ‘talentless nobody’. It was a sore spot for his twin, and although he tried numerous times to tell the spiky haired male that talent wasn’t everything and that if anything it was just a burden on him and others with it, it never seemed to console the boy at all. So, he eventually gave up trying, there was no point in repeating the same information if the person listening wasn’t actually going to understand what he was saying. He could really be a stupid, stubborn and mule like person when he was aggravated and Izuru rather deal with a docile Hajime than a rude one, but as the terms continued from the first to the second the changes that Hajime was undergoing were glaringly obvious but he didn’t put forth the effort to understand them.

_‘If you are so smart how about you tutor me!?’_

_‘Izuru I can’t be the only one cooking for us, unlike you I have a lot of homework assignments that are due each week. The least you can do is get off your lazy butt and make lunches for us!’_

_‘Why the hell are you in my dorm room! You have a giant room for yourself! If you really want to spend so much time in these terrible dorm rooms go ask that fancy pants board to give you one or something!’_

_‘Izuru… can’t you just help me for once! Please! I’m so tired of doing all of this by myself! Please! I don’t ask you for much just please can’t you help me!’_

_‘Nevermind Izuru… it doesn’t matter anymore. No one cares. Why did I think you’d care? If it doesn’t interest you, you just ignore it huh? I guess you’ll leave me too because I’m such a bore, aren’t I?’_

_‘Izu…ru…. I’m… sor…ry….’_

_‘How his twin brother is so good at everything, how his IDENTICAL TWIN IS SO FUCKING GREAT THAT YOU MIGHT AS WELL NOT EXIST!’_

“Am I really that terrible?” The words escaped his mouth shocking everyone that day in Miaya’s little office area, among the crowd that was his classmates, days after the incident with Hajime being attacked.

“Well I mean you can come off as a know-it-all ass so I can see why your brother would hate you…oouuueeeooow! What gives!” Kazuichi Souda yelped, his blunt statement not being appreciated by the small creatures known as the Four Dark Devas who bit the boy’s ankle in retaliation; whether it was from their owner’s will or not Izuru couldn’t tell during that time.

“Souda this isn’t the time to reprimand Hinata when you did not help the situation at all! And with that video you showed everyone in the Main Course auditorium no less!” The Ultimate Princess said curtly, not very pleased with the comments coming from the magenta-haired teen.

“Don’t blame me! Komaeda is the one who showed me the video and then said you would find it funny too and the video was too small on the phone so I had to put it on the projector! And it’s not like Hinata stopped the video from being played and not like I’m the one who invited his twin to have everyone laugh at him! That was all Komaeda too!” Souda pleaded, trying to get the Princess’ favor back only to receive an icy glare from her.

“I admit I found it amusing at first thinking it was all in good fun, however as soon as both of the Hinata brothers started their spat I could tell that this wasn’t in good nature and was done to be malicious and cruel. The fact that you still find this amusing at the torment people receive shows a lack of maturity that I find more disgusting than the smell that you usually have.” Sonia crossed her arms, looking away from the boy and instead locked eyes with Izuru, despite the fact that he was now more out of sorts than he had been previously.

The entire conversation in front of him with Sonia and Souda made it seem like an out of body experience, his mind too in shock to process calmly all of the information properly. His throat felt tight, and his chest ached, his mouth becoming dry and parched as he wanted to speak but nothing coming out. He was having a panic attack it would seem, as he grabbed for his tie trying to loosen it and unbuttoning two holes of his shirt to try and get the choking feeling to subside to no avail. He was becoming both keenly away of everyone’s eyes on him as his breaths became shorter and more rapid. This was most likely what Hajime felt when he panicked were the only words on his mind as he felt his legs give out and collapse to the floor feeling hot, coughing hoarsely as his breathing became more and more uneven before finally having himself become overwhelmed where the world went black.

“Fuck! What happened for him to freak out likeeee-owww Gundamn put those damn rodents away already! I’m going to get rabies at this rate!”

“You fool my Devas have been given elixirs and enchantments to prevent all forms of disease from tainting their bodies and those around them. You need to watch what thy says if you dare not seek their rage for hurting the Black Warlock’s soul with your miasmic words!”

“In Japanese please!!!! What the hell are you saying?”

“I-I think h-he was saying to… sh-shut up…. Eeee I’m sorry but can you all move so I can look over H-Hinata? I think he passed out from a panic attack!” The voice of the Ultimate Nurse rang in Izuru’s ears as he had not truly passed out but he couldn’t open his eyes either, his head hurting too much to respond and his body aching with tightness he still felt overwhelm his throat and chest.

“Hi-hinata c-can you hear me? I’m going to make sure you’re okay s-so just try to stay still and wait for us to get you somewhere to r-rest a-alright?” He vaguely remembered nodding his head to the voice above him as he felt the girl’s nimble hands examine him, taking off his tie and removing his uniform jacket, as well as a few more buttons on his shirt.

“I called for someone at the Nurse’s Office to come and bring a stretcher for Hinata. I don’t think he should be going anywhere right now…” Miaya’s quiet voice said to what Izuru assumed was the whole class, if none of them removed themselves from the room like he thought.

What happened afterward Izuru could guess, no, not guess so much as assure himself as these situations were just as predictable as everything else. They brought him to the Nurse’s Office to rest, he would be looked over and told he needed some anxiolytics to calm his nerves and either be forced to take them or given them without asking first. They would then call his parents to tell them that he had a panic attack. His parents would be either embarrassed or concerned over the situation depending on how their work day was going. And then ask if he needed to see a doctor, and then insist he should go home for a fews days to rest despite the fact that neither of them would actually be able to monitor him. They’d be too preoccupied with work and likely delegate the task to his paternal grandparents who were retired and have ‘too much time on their hands’ and then get shipped off to their home out in the country for the rest of the week.

Unsurprisingly he was correct when he had awoken, seeming to have actually passed out somewhere along the way to the Nurse’s Office. He wasn’t breathing as heavily anymore and was now in a loose gym T-shirt most likely belonging to Nekomaru as it fit more like a dress on him than a shirt. His parents had been called and he was told he’d be taken to his grandparents for a few days to relax. Jin Kirigiri actually insisting on it, saying he needed to take a few days off for a mental health break. The grimace on the man’s face was all too telling that there was another underlaying reason, to which he could come up with at least three possible conclusions, but in the end, he just agreed to it. Like he did for anything when asked of him. He’d just silently nod his head and agree to it. But it always left a foul taste in his mouth, and he wasn’t sure why, but it could have been due to the reminder he got from Hajime weeks ago stating how much of a doormat the younger twin was compared to the older of the two. It wasn’t true, Hajime was just as bad as Izuru was but in denial. Izuru knew he had tendencies to just go along with whatever adults asked of him. Not due to pressure like Hajime, no, it was just logical; or perhaps it was due to fear and pressure, but he doesn’t know if that really was the case as such emotions still escaped him at times. But right at that moment in Miaya’s office certainly felt like fear and regret, and it was paralyzing, and he wasn’t sure why.

“Why isn’t anything making sense anymore?” He all but murmured to himself, not bothering to pay attention to his surroundings, not his own constitution, for if he did, he would notice that he went sitting upright in his bed to curling into a ball and the various pairs of eyes looking unto him in concern.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also Genshin Impact has been distracting me and other things too. 
> 
> Next Chapter: Sato Sakakura's & Mahiru Koizumi's Dilemmas


	8. Sato Sakakura's & Mahiru Koizumi's Dilemmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mahiru and Sato with a little Juzo added in make together a bitter batter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After reading please read my note at the bottom about Juzo. Just so things don't get taken the wrong way.

“Big brother Juzo is amazing!!!” Those were the words that Sato Sakakura would say about her older cousin when she was a child.

The two of them were far enough apart in age where he could very well be her older brother and the fact that he often spent more time with her own family than his due to how busy his parents were growing up only cemented their relationship to be more akin to siblings than just relatives. And like many siblings they would often fight over things. Who could watch tv first, who could pick what dinner they would have for the night, who could use the shower first, and even silly things like who could eat the last slice of cake that her family bought from the bakery; even though she’d always win because of his diet as The Ultimate Boxer prevented him from eating too many sweets much to his disappoint and large sweet tooth. 

Now however their fights were a little more serious, such being that Sato was pissed off at her brother figure for two reasons. The first was the fact that he looked down on the Reserve Course and acted rudely to all students in it despite being a security guard for the entire school, not just the Main Course Campus. And the second was the fact that some weeks prior, a few days after her suspension started, her classmate and acquaintance bordering on friend Hajime Hinata got a good beating from him. When the teen demanded to speak to some of the Main Course students about her rival of sorts Natsumi Kuzuryu’s attack and her own suspension it didn’t turn out in a pleasant way. The older man, in actuality young adult in his twenties, waved off Sato’s concerns and anger as an annoyance and ignored her as she berated him on his stupid actions. Even going so far as to say the kid was lowly and deserved it, and that Sato deserved her 6-month suspension because of her involvement in Natsumi’s attack, despite Sato having no involvement at all. She had a very strained relationship with the girl. Yes, she hated the girls scheming and guys of course, but actually attacking the girl, hell no she didn’t! She is the one who arrived just in time to save the blonde girl's life, hell the damn Yakuza family sent her gifts for rescuing the girl despite said girl now being in a coma and knowing their strained relationship. 

The young adult was even put in charge of the girl when her parents had been told to transfer to a new city back in the beginning of the second term and had trusted him to take care of her. However, taking care of her seemed to have different definitions from person to person as he would often be found calling her parents to tell them one thing without letting her say her side of the story. This made Sato even more annoyed with her brother figure and it started to get exponentially worse when her best friend, Mahiru Koizumi The Ultimate Photographer, came over to visit her. He had to the nerve to practically interrogate Mahiru the entire time she was over, acting like the three years of their friendship suddenly didn’t matter when Mahiru got her Ultimate title and still wanted to hang out with Sato.

“Mahiru please tell me Juzo didn’t interrogate you again when you brought me my homework today?” Sato came back into her room to see the cherry red haired girl fiddling around with her camera nervously.

“Umm well….” Mahiru watched as Sato placed a tray of oolong tea, senbei, and cookies on the small table in front her. “He might have questioned me about something different this time and I may have threatened him I’d call the principal if he kept being rude…”

“What did he do this time?” Sato asked with dread in her voice as she dropped herself down on the floor pillow, startling Mahiru a bit with dramatic action and tone of voice.

“Well…” Mahiru picked up her tea and nervously started rubbing it over the rim of the glass, causing a high-pitched ring, further delaying what she wanted to say.

“He might have asked if you ever got beat up by the same people who hurt Natsumi and the Hinata boy from your class. And then demanded pictures of any injuries or bruises you may have had. And when he was getting ruder, I told him that you can’t ask a lady for that kind of information… and then he was being stupid because he said I wasn’t making his job easier. And I actually didn’t threaten him with calling the principal so much as l was already on hold with Director Kirigiri… and then I told him that unless he started working harder on this case, I’d blackmail him…”

“Mahiru! Is that where he went rushing out the door!?” Sato slumped over and covered her face with her hands looking somewhat mortified.

“I’m sorry but he was pissing me off! The way he originally phrased it was something like ‘If you have pictures of Sato without her clothes on give them to me. And I got mad and then he clarified he meant if you had proof of abuse happening to you, and you know I can’t remain composed when men start acting so useless and demanding!” Mahiru covered her face in embarrassment, feeling mortified for even having to experience this awkwardness.

“He’s seriously pissing me off with how he is so wishy-washy! Why must boys be like that?” Mahiru sighed, removing her hands from her face, cheeks as red as her hair as she meekly looked at her best friend. “Again, I’m sorry it was just really making me defensive…”

“Mahiru… Don’t worry about it he’s just an idiot when it comes to communication. On top of that he’s also an uptight closeted gay guy who is taking his self-esteem issues and haughty opinions out on others, usually in some verbal fashion… Not that it’s right of him to do that but that’s another issue for another day. I just wish I wasn’t under house arrest on top of being suspended. I miss having lunch with you, Ibuki, Hiyoko, and Mikan…” Sato said with a sigh, the rowdy bunch of girls from the Main Course always bringing her joy; it was one of the few pleasures she got from being in that hell hole of the Reserve Course.

“Oh right! Speaking of them! Hiyoko gave me an extra kimono for you to wear on New Years for the temple visit. You think you can manage to not be under house arrest for a few hours for a shrine visit?” Mahiru looked at her hopefully, really wanting to get back to some sense of normalcy within the crazy situation that was happening at their school.

“I might be able to if I said you all were going…” Sato looked at her thoughtfully, only jumping is surprise when Mahiru passed her the bag with a dark green kimono filled with beautiful abstract designs.

“Well see if your parents can convince him, I just want us all to hang out together again. Things have been really awkward since you have been stuck at home. And I don’t know how to talk about any of this stuff with the others you know?”

“Yeah… honestly I didn’t think this would actually blow up so much. Seeing as the school originally hid what happened to Natsumi. I’m surprised the Kuzuryu’s didn’t get on it right away. You’d think the yakuzas would be all over their little princess getting attacked…” Sato said somewhat bitterly, kind of wishing none of this started in the first place.

“Yeah well Miss Yukizome said that it was kind of hard to cover it because of Hinata’s… err Izuru Hinata’s involvement. People usually try to ignore what happens with the yakuza or are too scared to talk about these things I guess, but when a genius with the nickname of “Ultimate Hope” of Hope’s Peak Academy cancels all of his assigned projects and well doesn’t attend school people apparently go digging for information…” Mahiru’s glum face made Sato worry, it wasn’t the kind of look she ever liked seeing on the usually cheerful Mahiru.

“And let me guess some idiots from the Reserve Course somehow got their hands on some photos of the event and spread it to some tabloids?” Sato rubbed her temples in frustration, feeling even worse for both of their classmates.

“Well not just tabloids apparently to legitimate news stations too. Even Nanami has been getting harassed because someone leaked who her fundraiser was for… Though to be fair it’s not like she was hiding it very well when she streams… She hasn’t even been to class really either”

“Streams?” Sato eyes widened in surprise to hear that not only their genius classmate but all the Class Representative were also skipping classes. “Wait so is she like skipping class and streaming all of the time then?”

“Pretty much… And because she’s streaming video games and Beta-Testing a lot of newer games too she can’t get in trouble with the school since she’s practicing her talent. She’s quite popular too from what I’ve seen. Which makes her getting harassed even more concerning…” Mahiru frowned, from what Sato could tell this was a big problem.

“Harassed in what way? Like just people calling her stuff and sending her rude comments or like them sending her creepy packages and such?”

“Thank god no on the packages but I was watching one of her streams during a break and some idiots had to be blocked from the moderators because they started insulting Hinata and later on in the stream they started insulting his brother, our classmate let me mind you, and started calling him some sadistic asshole who probably coerced or I forget what it’s called but something with suicidal ideation or something like that to his twin. Like do these people have nothing better to do than insult others! And Hinata won’t pick up his phone or answer any of these reporters so they started hanging around the school gate waiting for him to leave but the guy I don’t think leaves his room except to go to the Neurology Lab!”

Mahiru rubbed her head in frustration, grabbing a rice cracker and stuffing it in her mouth and taking a large swig of her tea as if to eat her frustrations away. They sat in silence for a good while before switching topics. What they were going to do for Christmas, how she was going to convince her family what to do for New Year’s Day, if Mahiru was going to sleep over her apartment during break, is Sato was going to make cookies together, whether Mahiru’s classmates could come if they did make cookies. It was mundane, it was distracting, it was _normal_ , or as normal as they could get during that time period. Even as their pile of snacks dwindled Sato removed herself momentarily to bring more that she had in their pantry, and laughing when she stated the yakuza are going to make her fat with all of the different treats they kept sending to her home. This time it was some fancy instant ramen cups and cake from a chic new bakery downtown that the two of them would never be able to line up for in time to get into before they’d sell out. Even Mahiru ended up complimenting whatever men picked out such refined food as the ramen was indeed gourmet and by a famous restaurant in Tokyo; not to mention the cake was superb. By the time Juzo had arrived home Sato had just left her room with Mahiru ready to see her off.

“What are you still doing here? It’s late and almost curfew for you Main Course Students.” Juzo crossed his arms, looking toward the girls with a harsh tone of voice.

“We got caught up with homework and hanging out. But it’s still more than enough time for Mahiru to get home. I don’t know why you’re getting mad… she even told the dorm advisor that she’d be out.” Sato glared at her cousin, not liking his tone of voice.

“Well that’s all fine and dandy but aren’t you taking up too much of her time? You’re supposed to be reflecting on your attitude not having girls time.”

“MY ATTITUDE!? I don’t think I’m the one with the attitude problem here!’ Sato yelled at the man, shaking with anger.

“Sato… Please don’t start anything else. Remember New Year’s…” Mahiru pulled on the hem of Sato’s sweater in concern.

“What about New Year’s? Don’t tell me you plan on going out then?” Juzo looked at the two girls skeptically.

“Yes Sato and my friends were planning on getting together on New Year’s to visit the shrine. And we were hoping you’d allow her to go. If not… we were going to ask her parents for permission.” Mahiru said calmly, but held her tongue lest she start another argument with the guy that day.

“No. You’re not going. And that’s final.” Juzo stated matter of factly, not even surprised when both girls looked at him in shock, mouths agape.

“You can’t be serious! Sato barely gets to-“

“I’m not going to have this discussion with an outsider present so you better be on your way home Miss Koizumi.”

“Hey don’t talk to Mahiru like that! She not an outsider she’s my best friend!” Sato balled her fists in anger, her friend also glaring at the man in front of them.

“Get going or I will make sure you’re not allowed to come here to visit again.”

“Y-you can’t do that Juzo! I’ll go crazy being alone for so long! I can’t visit anyone, and you barely allow anyone to visit me! You won’t even let me leave the house to go to the convenience store!”

“I can and I will, you forget that I am in charge here when your parents are out Sato. So Miss Koizumi this is my last warning, leave now or you won’t be allowed to visit again.” Juzo crossed the room and opened the door to the apartment signaling for her to leave.

“Fine… but this isn’t the end of this.” Mahiru grit her teeth, picking up her coat off the hook and making her way out of the apartment into the winter weather. “I’ll call you when I get home Sato. See ya…”

“See you…” Sato said bitterly, waving goodbye as her friend walked past her cousin, giving him one last glare before disappearing from sight completely.

The door slammed shut and deadbolt locked as Juzo looked over to the young girl who was already turning around to leave the room. As he yelled at her to stop Sato turned her head and sent him a seething glare; even surprising the man as she gave him a cold glare that rivaled his own. With Sato ignoring him as the man walked after her, being pushed away when her tried to grab her arm to prevent her from leaving. By the time Sato reached her room she locked the door and jumped on her bed. Hot tears were rolling down her cheeks as she tried to drown out the yelling of her older brother figure telling her he could just break down the door. She didn’t want to hear what his excuse was this time for his harsh words, nor did she care if he was hurt by hers and Mahiru’s actions. Right now, all Sato could focus on was muffling her cries and screams with a pillow. Crying out in anguish for each memory of her and Natsumi arguing, for the loud lunches with Ibuki’s death metal, for the missed shopping ventures with Hiyokoi, the horror movie marathons with Mikan, and even the snarky and embarrassing talks with Hajime Hinata the resident tsundere of her class. All of them were gone, all of these moments taken away, and each memory made her cry more and more with the amount of despair she felt with being so secluded. She was being scapegoated and punished because her teacher didn’t want to deal with the aftermath of Natsumi’s attack, she was being punished by her cousin, the brother-like figure that she looked up to for years, just because she refused to do what he wanted and leave the school, and she was being punished just for being friends with people others didn’t like. And it made her grow frustrated, sad, angry, depressed, and most of all lonely. As she continued to lay there, her head buried into her pillow she flinched in surprise when her cell phone began to buzz, the alert of an email being received.

[Mahiru <3- The Fab Photographer]

_‘Hey Sato I’m finally home! Good night~’_

Sato couldn’t help but laugh at the silly way Mahiru sent that message.

[~Sato~ Photography is my Soul Animal]

_’Hey I thought you said youd call me when you got back. Lol :P’_

[Mahiru <3- The Fab Photographer]

_‘Sorry but my dorm’s quiet hours got changed again T^T And my room isn’t as sound proof as the others…’_

[~Sato~ Photography is my Soul Animal]

_‘Seriously? That sucks… Well I’m happy you got home alright’_

[Mahiru <3- The Fab Photographer]

‘ _Yeah same. Some creep I thought was following me home so I was glad to get to the dorms. Anyway… how are you holding up? Are you okay after Mr Sakukura yelling at you?’_

Sato stared blankly at the last part of the statement, the beginning part hadn’t worried her too much with how vigilant Mahiru was; knowing where every Police Box on the way to Hope’s Peak and reporting suspicious people all of the time. Yes, the fact that she was so careful didn’t worry her. What worried her was how to respond to Mahiru’s message. Her phone getting numerous messages asking if she was still there, and if she wanted Mahiru to call despite it being quiet hours. So she settled after much debate and many changes to her message to two simple sentences.

[~Sato~ Photography is my Soul Animal]

_‘I’m not alright. Just go to bed I’ll talk to you in the morning Mahiru.’_

[Mahiru <3- The Fab Photographer]

_‘Okay night…’_

And with that Sato shut off her light and closed phone, waiting for the darkness to lull her into a peaceful slumber that would be better than her nightmare of reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for anyone curious or confused Sato actually was lucky and avoided any physical or verbal abuse from the other students unlike Hajime and Natsumi who were easier targets due to their problems with inadequacy. Sato was fully comfortable not being on Mahiru's level and just wanted to support her and she doesn't' keep secrets from Mahiru so she can vent her problems easier. 
> 
> And on another note Juzo just wanted any evidence of physical harm going on in the Reserve Course, but since Sato was being left alone she doesn't have any to give him. He thought Mahiru would have taken pictures as evidence to prove any bullying issues in the Reserve Course so him asking for photos was more to do his job and is not to be taken any other way.


	9. Juzo's Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not much to say except some of Juzo's thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this is rushed. I had a splurge of inspiration and wrote this but also I got super tired but wanted to post this at the same time so... I apologize if this is crappy.

Juzo Sakukura’s life was fairly straight-forward growing up. Even with the complications of having to live between his own home and his relatives due to family circumstances his life was always on track. That was until he and his two best friends graduated from Hope’s Peak Academy and went off with their careers. Even with the craziness of trying to change the world he would have Kyosuke Munakata accomplish his goals and he would protect Chisa Yukizome with his life. Everything was in its place until he and Chisa got hired by Hope’s Peak; where they were trying to attempt to see what the Steering Committee had been up to with the formation of the Reserve Course and the dubious intentions behind it. He would work security and Chisa would work as a teacher’s assistant, well that was the plan that had a wrench thrown into it when Chisa got upgraded to essentially being the Homeroom teacher for Class 77-B around the time the second term started; at the same time, he was upgraded to Head of Security Detail. Neither he nor Chisa had planned for this and it made him on edge. 

Munakata was always trying to be one step ahead of everything, a true leader with his compassion, his rational thinking, and his charisma. He was someone who Juzo felt on equal terms with, he was one of Juzo’s best friends, and he could never be more to him than a person with extreme loyalty lest he be found out what his true feelings were for the white-haired man. No, he had to stay on his straight path as he always told himself, but that grew more difficult with each passing day. And it only spiraled more with this mission at Hope’s Peak and a certain group of people whose opinions, egos, and rotten attitudes rubbed him the wrong way: The Reserve Course.

He knew he shouldn’t be too harsh on the children going there. Some were there against their wills, being forced to attend to make themselves look good for a better college or university to accept them; only following their parents’ wishes. Others were rich little snobs who wouldn’t put in any work at all, trying to get what the hard-working talented people in the Main Course had despite having nothing worthwhile to show. And then there were the people riding off the coattails of their family who attended the Main Course, those were the ones that pissed him off the most, thinking they deserved to be around the Main Course students just by proxy. One student of which he’d get into many spats with whenever he saw the kid playing games alongside the girl whom Yukizome made the Class Representative. He was the twin brother of the most talented kid in the school currently, and the student that both Yukizome and himself were to make sure the Steering Committee couldn’t get their hands on at all costs.

He figured that if the committee was aware of their relationship that they would try to make things harder on the boy so as to isolate the two brothers away from each other, or worse make sure the one disappears. The student was in danger the more he stuck around his twin and any of the Ultimates. Part of him wanted to protect the kid and other wanted to beat the living day-lights out of him. He wasn’t sure why but that defiance in the kid’s eyes always rubbed him the wrong way. That’s why when some of the reports coming from that kid about bullying and attacks on campus around the Reserve Course he’d purposefully ignore or state that there wasn’t enough evidence to work with. It’s why when he saw the kid, he’d purposefully rile him up and cause a fight just to punch the kid to the ground and show him his place. Hajime Hinata the name that he couldn’t get out of his head now even if he wanted to. Because as of now his job was to investigate the case of that student. Was it an attempted suicide or was it assault? And if it was assault who’d have the balls to do it in such a public place? It was making him more unnerved than he wanted, especially when it came to having to go to the Reserve Course building and walk to the first-year classroom the kid was placed.

“What’s the head of security doing here?”

“I dunno but why is a girl from the Main Course here too?”

“Hey who’s that pretty lady? Is she a teacher of the Main Course?”

“Man… I wish I had a teacher as hot as her.”

“Wait isn’t that Mahiru Koizumi the Ultimate Photographer?”

“Shit what are they going to do?”

“Umm isn’t that the classroom of those kids who committed suicide?”

“Suicide? I thought they were attacked by some perverts?”

“On campus? Then wouldn’t that mean that the perverts are the teachers or other students?”

  
“Well for all we know those two were whoring themselves out to be here, or I guess in Kuzuryu’s case she would be doing it to get into the Main Course…”

“Eeek did that guy just glare at us?”

“Let’s get going! Come on…” A few students ran by Juzo in a rush, squeezing past him in the crowded hallway; the gossip they were spreading was far from what he cared about, or rather he didn’t care at all, but it didn’t sit right with him for some reason and it bothered him to his own confusion.

“Umm here’s their classroom…” Mahiru Koizumi pointed to the doors labeling it as Class 1-E sliding open the door where the students who were already in class suddenly turned to see the odd group there.

“Hey what do you think you’re doing in my homeroom?” The older man, roughly in his forties is Juzo was guessing correctly, yelled at the group who were making their way to one of the further desks in back of the room by the window.

“Mister Miyamoto? I already sent you prior notice that I was running an investigation on both Kuzuryu’s and Hinata’s _incidents_ and was coming to collect evidence from the students’ desks and classes.” Juzo gave a strong glare at the man, whom grit his teeth in annoyance at the orders being given to him.

“W-well I didn’t receive anything stating you were coming, a-and besides there isn’t anything to get. Hinata and Kuzuryu were always trouble makers and-“

“Really? I can believe Natsumi being a trouble-maker because of her haughty attitude but I doubt she’d do anything deserving of being beaten up to the point of near death via blunt trauma to the head. And while I don’t know Hinata personally on a more intricate level I don’t see why his desk would be covered in scrawling telling him to go die. And another thing! You should be telling off your students for putting flower vases on their desks when neither of them is actually dead!” Mahiru yelled at the teacher, eyes full of hatred and defiance at the man’s accusations.

“Yes, I do fear that you teaching your students ill manners by leaving such things on the student’s desks. Especially when those things include graffiti that is very indicative of bullying. Why it makes me…”

“Yukizome go and collect what you need and Koizumi just take those damned pictures so we can get a move on already.” Juzo said with a stern look upon his face, wanting them to hurry it up so they could leave this hell hole; it felt suffocating just being in that room whether it was from poor ventilation or the atmosphere he just wanted out.

“Right…” Koizumi started snapping away on her camera, making her way toward Natsumi’s desk afterward, finding similar but at the same time less harsh graffiti on her desk.

“Right well there isn’t much I have to do but I’ll grab what I need… you just handle the fingerprints…” Yukizome handed him the kit as she started digging through whatever remains were in Hinata’s desk.

“What fingerprints!? Y-you can’t just take finger prints like that!” Miyamoto yelled, his face turning red, and the students looking on with nervousness as the Security Chief ignored the yelling of the man.

“Oi! Shut your trap! This is my investigation and I will send you the information regarding getting the students and their parents’ consents to take fingerprints from your class or any other class we deem necessary to investigate. Capeesh?” And without waiting for a response Juzo continued his work. 

It didn’t take long for him to get what he needed and the girls to finish their tasks either. Giving the teacher another dirty look before leaving seemed like the most satisfying thing he did since coming to that building. He actually felt a bit sorry for the Hinata kid for being in such a repressive environment, however it was only a little. He still held contempt for this pathetic existence of a school. It didn’t live up to the same expectations as Hope’s Peak’s Main Course. It didn’t hold a candle to how nurturing the teachers in the Main Campus taught the prodigies around them. It was like a prison, a cold and crowded prison where no one would find any joy. Even through Yukizome’s investigations where she found a lot of grade alterations in the students’ profiles and the many assignment papers that Hinata had saved, for some god forsaken reason, she found a lot of his assignments had been graded unfairly in order to drop his GPA down during the second term. 

“Well this is wonderful…” Yukizome had said to him one night during their investigation, sounding very distraught.

“What is it? Some trouble in your class?”

“You can say that… Izuru Hinata decided to skip classes along with Nanami. Now my two students who usually keep the class in check are now gone. It’s terrible…” Yukizome moaned in complaint, on the verge of ripping her hair out.

“Well nothing you can do about it now. So long as they are working on their ‘talents’ they can skip classes. Remember like how we used to?”

“Yeah but Juzo… my class was finally starting to get along. This seems like a huge setback.”

“Yeah well though luck for you I guess... Anyhow I’m going to get home, my cousin is waiting for me and probably ready to kill me for everything I’ve said to her lately” Juzo got up and pushed in his chair, grabbing whatever file she could carry in his bag before making his way to the door.

“You know I think you should be treating her more gently. She was Hinata and Kuzuryu’s classmate too you know.”

“Yeah I know… which is why I want to get her out of there as soon as possible. Even if she ends up hating me for it.

“Well look at you being the protective big brother.” Yukizome said without a hint of sarcasm, giving a wry smile before sighing and calling it a day herself.

“Just shu-shut up!” Juzo had to refrain from blushing. “Just get on going I has places to be as well.”

“Right. Right…. Just one last thing Juzo. Do you hate Hajime that much? You seem to want to avoid looking at his profile at all, and I doubt you think this was just some ploy for attention. So why are you ignoring helping someone who needs it?” Yukizome looked at his with concern not only for her pseudo-students but as as the friend she loves dearly.

“Yeah I hate his guts. I hate them so much because it’s… it’s like looking in a mirror….” 


	10. Into Izuru's Mind Part 2: Unfortunate Family Matters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izuru is shippe doff to his grandparent's place and has a long talk with his grandfather and finds out some bad news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I put trigger warnings in the first chapter but like here's some one for this chapter: Mentions of cancer, Mentions of Dying, Panic Attacks.

Izuru was shipped off to his grandparents for some time. He was told by Jin that he needed rest and that this matter was not to be argued upon. Meaning that Izuru had no say in the matter for being told to stay at home and away form school. Not that he was complaining, he could sleep all day and no one would complain to him about it. His grandparents had always been “too soft” as his parents would say on both himself and Hajime. If they were staying there, the older couple would tend to give them too much food, not many chores to do, and would just chat with the two boys. Their grandfather tending to favor Hajime when it came to trying old traditional things like wood carving, or building models, and their grandmother tending to favor Izuru into trying a lot of new and strange cooking or hobbies. At times Izuru would ponder if their grandfather disliked him because of his lack of interest in things after he learned how to do them, whereas Hajime would be happy to repeat the same sort of hobby continuously unless he was told he was terrible at it. Seeing as the two grandparents were the only ones who truly supported Hajime and Izuru in any of their endeavors he did come to the conclusion that their grandfather just simply had more fun with Hajime when it came to certain activities; even if it did sting a little when he thought about it. But it was never like he forced Izuru into participating in anything he didn’t want to do, so in a way Izuru understood why he wouldn’t be invited.

So, when he arrived to his grandparents’ home for a short stay, he was quite surprised when his grandfather was the first one to welcome him and that the man didn’t even let him go sulk in his guest bedroom. Despite his attitude all but saying that he didn’t want to speak with the older man. In less than an hour of being there with half of it being in awkward silence from Izuru’s part, his grandfather finally spoke out words that he didn’t think he’d hear.

“I’m going to die soon you know. I wish I could’ve spent more time with you and your brother but I guess it will be just us two huh?” He said calmly, setting down his cup of tea on the table in front of them that he had brought out when Izuru first arrived; the snacks and tea pot still fairly full from neither of them eating much.

“What….?” Izuru thought of various possibilities as to why the older man would be on the verge of dying so soon: Kidney Failure, pancreatic cancer, brain tumors, neurological disorders, metastatic colon cancer, dementia…the list went on, but the man only smiled solemnly at Izuru who had been at a loss for words.

“Surprised you huh? Well I’ve been trying to get treatment for it but everything failed, even the experimental drugs don’t seem to work on it. So, the doctors have just been giving me meds to help with the pain and me getting by day to day until the end. I figured I may as well tell you. You know to prepare yah… I don’t want both of my dear grandsons in the hospital after all.” The man laughed as he pat Izuru on the head, ruffling his tangled hair as he looked fondly at Izuru, as he noticed the man always look at Hajime in the same way.

“I-“ Izuru felt stuck on what to say, just looking at the man before him, as he felt his throat tighten once again, and his mouth felt like it was filled with cotton.

“You don’t have to say anything kiddo. I know how your brain works and trust me I’ve tried everything out there. It’s gallbladder cancer, Stage Four, the stuff is hard to treat since you usually don’t find out until it gets really bad don’t ‘ya know?” His grandfather’s face crinkled up int a large grin, looking way too enthused for Izuru’s liking. “Now let’s move on from depressing stuff. Tell me any cute girls or boys catch your eye at that fancy school?”

“Well… I … uh… there is one but they have a girlfriend… So… it’s not possible at the moment.” Izuru said carefully and quietly, shifting his eyes from his grandfather to the tea in his hands.

“Hmmm well don’t give up just yet. Maybe you can win them over. Oh, but if you do win them over make sure to tell your grandmother so she can cook you up a feast. Same goes to Hajime when the lad wakes up.”

“Yeah…” Izuru muttered, figuring it was best to stop the conversation there then to continue it.

“You know, you and your brother think you’re good at hiding your feelings but your grandmother and I could always tell what was going on… It’s the reason why I never invited you to do some of those things with Hajime when you kids were growing up.” The old man looked at him fondly waiting to see if he’d respond before continuing. ”I knew you would be bored with what we were doing so your grandmother and I made sure to come up with ideas whenever you tikes would come over. It was hard to keep you both entertained, and while we’d both would have liked you kids to have fun together it just seemed like you both had different interests for the most part. So I guess I do kind of regret not being able to spend much time with you, but being with you now makes me feel more fulfilled and having gotten it off my chest I can defiantly die without any regrets. “

“Wh. D. u. ow…” Izuru’s mumblings were barely audible to the man, partially because he was scared to say it out loud and partially with him trying to keep his composure; his cup agitated in his hands almost as if it was going to break.

“Pardon? I couldn’t hear you Izuru.”

“I SAID. WHEN. DID ** _. YOU. KNOW_**?” Izuru felt his volume of his voice increase, the tone of it having a striking hint of anger and what was probably sadness to it; at this point he couldn’t tell what his emotions were doing anymore as he was finding it difficult to keep calm.

“Ahh… let me think. I believe it was a little before you two taking exams, so around your studying period? Maybe a year and a half ago roughly? I can’t exactly recall the exact date…”

“Why didn’t you tell me! I could have done something if I’d know! WHY DID YOU KEEP IT QUIET!” Izuru’s voice continued to crescendo in volume, anger, guilt, sadness, betrayal, there wasn’t an exact emotion he could pinpoint but rage seemed to fit the best; Yes, he was enraged that the man before him could just sit there calmly explaining that he kept a secret from his family for so long.

“I know you would have, which is why I didn’t say a word.” His grandfather carefully maneuvered his hands over to Izuru’s and in a swift motion took the cup that was still being held out of his hands and on to the table.

“You’re a bright boy, you’re incredibly intelligent but you are still a child. And I’ll be damned if I let a child feel like he has to take up the burden of caring for an old man like me when he still is growing up.” He paused for a moment, a thoughtful smile on his face that caught Izuru off guard. “Izuru I couldn’t bare watching you struggle and suffer over trying to find a cure for me when you should be out making friends and trying to find new things to do. And let’s say for argument that you did try and find a cure for me. What if that cure didn’t work and by then it was already too late? I didn’t want you to be burdened with guilt. You’re not good at showing it but both you and Hajime are very sensitive people. You just bury your feelings more than he does and I think you need to let those feelings out sometimes or else you’re going to suffer. Just like how you’re suffering now.”

“What are you trying to say?” Izuru felt his jaw tighten as he bit down on his lip, trying not to raise his voice any longer, his voice quivering once more that week with the utmost confused feeling he’s ever had.

“I’m saying that kids like you and your brother as so alike that you suffer in silence, and I feel horrible that there was nothing could be to get either of you to break down that shell in front of me. You both are so on guard that the things you say often hurt yourselves or others without trying and you both need to be more honest with your feelings. Especially toward each other… Izuru… it’s okay to cry right now even if it’s hard for you. It’s okay to say you’re lonely and you miss Hajime. And it’s okay to say you are scared. Just keep that in mind alright?”

Izuru stared at the man confused and dazed. He didn’t understand what his grandfather was saying. He and Hajime actually were alike? That was impossible. Improbable. Hajime never hid his feelings; he was a thin-skinned person who wore his heart on his sleeve. It would be impossible for him to hide anything from Izuru. It was impossible. It had to be or he would have noticed… But he didn’t notice Hajime’s suffering. Or did he ignore it? Did he unconsciously block it out or did he say he was tired of dealing with that bullshit? He couldn’t remember. Izuru, who had a perfect memory, couldn’t remember at all. He couldn’t remember anything about Hajime recently for that matter. Maybe he was ignoring his brother’s cries for help as subtle as they were. Or maybe he was just… may he was really just a terrible person.

Izuru’s breath picked up once more, the speed between each breath increasing as his mind raced on with all of his thoughts. If he had been more aware of himself of his surroundings, he would have noticed that he was holding his head in his hands, he would have noticed that he was getting double vision as the panic he was feeling made the experience worsen. He would have noticed that his grandfather was trying desperately for him to calm down because he started scratching at his head in frustration. He would have noticed many things but in the end he didn’t or rather he couldn’t notice them. And once again his world grew dark like it had the other day. His head ached in pain as the panic didn’t seem to disappear, his eyes refused to open and he felt faint. And then he couldn’t think anymore, everything went quiet, as his body decided to pass out; unaware of the cries for help his grandfather had as he held his grandson in worry.

When Izuru woke up however, instead of seeing the ceiling of some infirmary or hospital he saw the ceiling of his grandparent’s guest room. He was still in the clothes he arrived in, a loose sweater with a T-shirt underneath, and some casual pants he couldn’t bother remembering the brand of. He was tucked into bed with empty packets of medication and a half-empty glass of water sitting next to it on the nightstand. He must have had another panic attack was the only thought on his mind, his brain feeling foggy from what he assumed was whatever drug concoction he was given and his body felt heavy. He didn’t even bother to move his head to look and see who opened his door when he heard the distinct sound of a knob turning and squeaky hinges moving.

“Ah I see our patient is finally awake. How are you feeling?” An unknown man walked across the carpeted floor as he came up to Izuru’s bedside; he was most likely a doctor if his white coat meant anything. 

“Crappy…” Was the only word Izuru was able to blurt out as he strained his neck to look at the man, who just seemed to give an awkward grin; most likely out of pity.

“Well I would think so. Two panic attacks over the course of a couple days would do that to you. Ah… but I should introduce myself I am Doctor Ishigami it’s a pleasure to meet you Izuru. Mister Hinata called me and told me you needed to be seen so I came over here as soon as possible and with some medication to help. I’m sorry I gave it to you without permission but your grandfather was quite worried.” The man, whom Izuru thought to be middle-aged, looked at him sympathetically, never increasing his tone past the soft gentle one he was giving; if Izuru had to guess he was probably used to dealing with children.

“So… what did you give me? My head feels fuzzy and I feel like I was hit by a truck. I assume it was benzodiazepines of some kind but they usually don’t cause one to feel so heavy from what I can recall…” Izuru said as he forced himself to sit upward, his arms feeling like they could give out at any moment and his eyelids still feeling quite heavy.

“Hahaha.” The man chuckled, whether it was in amusement at Izuru’s predicament or something else he wasn’t sure of.

“I don’t mean to laugh, it’s just your grandfather warned me about how… intelligent you were that I kind of underestimated _how_ talented you actually are. But I’d say you are just exhausted from both panic attacks and all of the stress you’ve been feeling as of late and your body is just getting around to telling you to take it easy. For now, just rest for today. I already called an order to the local pharmacy to have some emergency medication filled for you, in case you need it and they said they’d deliver it here later this afternoon. So, in case you do need it just take it as directed. I only gave a few days’ worth since you aren’t exactly a patient of mine…”

“Are you trying to imply I need to see someone?” Izuru said bluntly, trying to read into what the man was saying.

“I’ll be frank, as a doctor I feel that you should go to psychotherapy of some kind. I was informed that you’ve been under quite a few stressful events as of late. And Mister Hinata told you how he was dying. The fact that you have two family members in such dire predicaments would put a strain on anyone let alone a child. You are intelligent and very mature for your age; I can tell that by the limited information I have on you. But you are still a child, and that kind of stress can lead to depression. It’s best if you go see someone now before you continue to have breakdowns like this.” Dr. Ishigami stated, his calm tone not changing but there was a sternness to his voice that even made Izuru look away; as if trying to deny what the man was saying as true. 

“I’ll… think about it…” Izuru muttered, wanting to instead tell the doctor that he’d be just fine without seeing someone who’d just want to probe his head for details of anything else; he couldn’t trust a random doctor to tell him what was best for him.

“I guess that’s the best I’ll get out of you then… I heard you go to Hope’s Peak Academy. So… I listed some Children’s and Adolescents’ psychotherapy clinics that are nearby. Just give them my name and they will take you in right away. I’m friends with a few psychiatrists and psychologists so when I refer patients to them, they get taken care of very well.” The doctor held out a neatly folded sheet of paper, waiting for Izuru to take it, in which he reflexively did, nodding his head in thanks despite the bitter look on his face was most likely giving off.

“Goodbye Izuru, it was not necessarily a pleasure meeting you under the current circumstances but I hope this meeting will help you.” The man bowed before turning heel and walking back out the way he came.

“Goodbye.” Izuru muttered, not even bothering to make eye contact with the man nor watch the man leave.

So there Izuru sat, his brain still filled with fog, his body feeling hot and heavy from his apparent panic attack. His eyes burned, and felt puffy, as if he had been crying; when he wasn’t sure, but most likely in his sleep. He recalled having some sort of nightmare, but the specifics of it he didn’t remember. He gripped the paper further wrinkling it between his fingers. He was so close to just ripping the sheet into pieces and throwing it on the ground, trying to release some of this pent-up fire in his chest, which he assumed was anger, so he could just be rid of it all. But he didn’t do it, because a part of him that wanted to be rational told him not to do it, while the other part of him was screaming at him to stop fucking everything up and just be emotional. Izuru couldn’t understand what was going on in his head anymore. All logic seemed to go out the window and only raw repressed emotions seemed to fill his head. He wanted to cry, to scream, to be pissed off, and to vent this all out to someone, but no one was there for him, not anymore. So instead he pulled the covers back over his head and tried to sleep, that’s all he wanted to do now. So that’s what he did, for the entire day he ignored all his messages on his phone, all knocks on his door, and every email that was sent to him.

[Izuru’s iPhone]

_Yesterday 20:20 pm_

[Matsuda]: So heading to your grandparent’s place huh? Let me know when you get there. I don’t need you dying on me now.

 **[Izuru]:** Fine

[Matsuda]: God talking to you is like talking to a brick wall.

 **[Izuru]:** Rocks don’t talk Yasuke

[Matsuda]: Stop using my first name idiot! Just let me know when you are there okay?

_Today: 11:30 am_

[Matsuda]: You there yet?

_Today 12:30 pm_

[Matsuda]: Seriously can you be bothered to answer your phone?

_Today 13:46 pm_

[Matsuda]: Izuru ANSWER YOU DAMN PHONE!

_Today 18:17 pm_

_6 missed calls from Matsuda Yasuke_

_Today 20:49 pm_

[Matsuda]: So your grandfather answered your phone for you and told me what happened. We need to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So like umm Izuru part 2... Sorry if this seems odd. I hope it wasn't too bad of a chapter. And yes Izuru's grandfather is very supportive of LBGTQ+ relationships.  
> It will be brought up again later but The Hinata Family is pretty conservative and his grandparents were originally like that too but things changed later on, since the grandparents really just want to see their grandchildren happy. 
> 
> Also name ideas for the grandma and grandfather? I'm at a loss.


	11. Yasuke Matsuda to Izuru Hinata

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yasuke finally manages to get Izuru to bathe, trying to get the other boy to relax, only to get things he wasn't planning on dealing with pop up in his head. Meanwhile Izuru take notice in Yasuke's body...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah I'm going to apologize because I wrote something I wasn't planning on writing, but now it's there and I couldn't stop it. I blame Igirisuhito's fanfiction "Your love is a fraction, and it's not adding up" for influence on this chapter.
> 
> Also CW: Mentions of eating disorders, scars/surgical scars, body discomfort (NOT transgender related), mentions of abuse/toxic relationships, feeling uncomfortable of people's stares in both sexual and non-sexual ways, reference to abusive people and bad parents, non-descriptive nudity
> 
> Again I am so sorry by the amount of shit going on in here I swear it had a mind of its own. 
> 
> [Also NOTE]: Izuru usually calls people formally by their last name unless told otherwise to call them informally by their first name, in text messages he will call Matsuda by his first name 'Yasuke', on a whim or when trying to get his point across.

When Yasuke Matsuda said he’d take Izuru Hinata to take a bath in the school’s bathhouse, he never imagined it would be this much of a challenge to get the guy to change his clothes in a locker room with other students starting at the two of them. He knew Izuru’s presence could be distracting but he never knew that he’d have to police people into moving along so they’d stop crowding them as they were taking off their clothes. It was annoying as ever since Izuru moved slower than a snail when it came to bathing apparently and only seemed to move quicker when no one was watching. Which gave Yasuke the impression that he wasn’t comfortable being naked around strangers. Which to his credit was probably not without cause seeing as the other boy next to him was considered quite attractive. Such thoughts made his both equally disgusted and embarrassed at the same time as his friend clearly wasn’t charming when it came to normal social situations on a good day, but somehow still caught the eyes of everyone in a very _sexual_ way to the point it was kind of disturbing. But those thoughts were for another time and another Yasuke; the current version of his was already undressed with a towel wrapped around his waist ready to shower off for the bath.

“Geez what is taking you so long? I’m not going to wait here forever. Does the young master need help getting undressed or are you- wait Izuru are you okay?” Yasuke noticed Izuru’s eyes staring out into no particular place, as if he was not there at the moment.

“Hey… let’s go get changed over there instead okay?” Yasuke whispered, grabbing Izuru’s hand and gently dragging the boy to an area that had curtained changing stalls, pushing the taller boy into one of the empty along with a towel.

“No one should bother you alright? I’m already undressed so you just take your time okay?”

“Thanks…” He heard the other boy mutter; a soft sigh of relief being heard as the other teen quickly got changed much to Yasuke’s surprise.

“Listen I found some shampoo to try and get that tangled mop on your head under control but with all of those knots you might be better cutting a lot of it off. I know you like your hair long but it’s getting too wild for you to take care of alone. And I am not going to be in charge of that mess you call your hair.” Yasuke yelled loud enough for Izuru to hear, not caring at the stares he was getting as he picked up the shampoo that the school actually bought for the students to use; the label calling it Mane 'n Tail Detangling Shampoo, another one of the school’s more expensive purchases that he was actually thankful for.

“Miss Nevermind has hair cutting shears, I’ll ask her to bring them tomorrow.” Izuru stated, monotone as ever but the fact that he was agreeing to cut his hair had thrown Yasuke off.

“Okay well you can text her or call her or whatever when we are on our way to meet Miaya. So… hurry it up, we haven’t got all day you know!” Yasuke fidgeted the shampoo bottle in his hands growing more impatient by the second; despite having told the other teen to take his time he was hoping that kid would actually hurry it up. 

“I know it is late to say this but did you even bring a spare change of clothes? I assume you haven’t because that would have been-“

“Eck would you just shut up and get out here already! We can just run to one of our rooms and borrow each other’s clothes afterward and put a shit ton of deodorant spray or some shit if you are that worried. If you are trying to stall from coming out, I will come in there and grab you myself.” Yasuke felt his face twitch in annoyance as the curtain finally opened to reveal the other teen with a look which he assumed was self-consciousness; something Yasuke wasn’t expecting to see from the taller boy.

“Fine let’s just go wash up… and please don’t tell me you are going to walk around with a towel around you like a girl…”

“Sorry that our faces aren’t the only thing I share with Hajime. Our bodies are the same too you know physically.” Izuru pushed past Yasuke and just threw his clothes in adjacent locker that the neurologist had put his own dirtied clothes in.

“Oh right… well come on I’ll make sure no one bothers you let’s get that hair of your washed.” Yasuke shook his head and dragged the teen over to the showering area, sitting Izuru down on the stool and nudging him to get rid of the towel; earning a glance of distaste from the long-haired teen, before the other let out a sigh and obliged to Yasuke’s request.

And so, after some struggling to get the moody teen to behave under the cold stream of water, waiting for the water to become hotter before trying to add shampoo to the knotted mass of hair in front of him. Yasuke eventually got the water to a decent enough temperature to work with, without burning his skin or Izuru’s for that matter, and slathered his hands in the detangling shampoo and getting to work scrubbing the long dark brown mess of strands starting at the bottom of his hair. Besides the running water, the scrubbing of hair and the breathing between the two of them, it felt deafeningly quiet. Yasuke’s hands started to get caught many times in all of the knots as he worked, detangling everything seemed like it would be impossible at this rate causing the doctor and mutter his grievances louder than expected and pulling the hair more than he intended causing a slight whimper of pain out of boy in front of him. After a half-sincere apology coming from Yasuke, to which Izuru gave no response to, he decided to move to his scalp, giving his best attempt to massage the tension away. It continued like this until Yasuke felt his fingers run over what seemed to jagged skin, indicative of scar tissue, and when he tried to trace the origins of it his hand was grabbed by none other than Izuru himself. A piercing glare, unlike anything had ever seen; it was only for a moment but the emotion in the mostly expressionless boy made even Yasuke feel a shiver of fear for once. He’d have to question Izuru about it, but at a later time.

“You can rinse it out yourself, I can’t spend my entire time cleaning you up. I got it you mostly washed up so you can take care of the rest. You’re not a baby…” He swiped the other’s hand away, returning with his own glare to act as normal as possible, and moved toward the adjacent shower and start to clean himself off.

“Sorry… I just don’t like people touching me there. I can’t even stand Hajime touching there… “Izuru said quietly, just trying to rinse his hair out as quickly as possible as far as Yasuke could tell.

“Whatever just clean yourself off. I don’t want have to wash another guy’s junk off, doing your hair was already awkward enough.”

“Hmmm sure whatever you say…” Izuru tried to steal a glance at Yasuke only to be slightly disappointed when the other boy seemed to be already done cleaning off, and started walking away; Yasuke unaware of these looks.

“Hurry the hell up if you don’t want any of the guys ogling you. I’m not going to play bodyguard forever you know.” Yasuke said as blunt as he ever was, but still didn’t walk off far; trying to get the other to get a move on but not really meaning what he was saying at the same time.

With a nod Izuru did hurry his pace, but walked far faster on the wet floor than what Yasuke was expecting, especially with how the floor was slick with soap residue and condensation as well as puddles of water that seemed to pool in pitted areas of the floor. So, when the two did finally get into the large bath, dipping down to their shoulders, all eyes were on them much to Yasuke’s displeasure. It didn’t help that this area was for both the Reserve Course and the Main Course students to use as well as any faculty or staff. The number of perverts around them was most likely large enough at any given time on a normal basis, but none of them would usually do anything. Their stares however were still enough to make Yasuke creeped out, and for that reason he could see why Izuru and even his twin probably didn’t like bathing in front of anyone. From what Yasuke remembered Izuru had stated that Hajime had a rather wide chest as well and were muscular enough that would often draw people’s attention to certain areas of their body unintentionally. Not that it was ever noticeable when either of them wore clothes, frankly he thought the two of them were as scrawny as he was; much to his displeasure at not being able to put on more muscle. His own body made him uncomfortable enough to avoid baths like this unless he was completely sure he was with a trusted individual or completely alone. Binging on snacks made one gain weight easily enough where even he was concerned over his physical figure, despite both Miaya’s and Izuru’s insistence that he wasn’t fat or overweight to the point of needing to worry about his health. But those thoughts were for another day, as he started to notice his body starting to overheat; one look at Izuru told him that the other teen was close to passing out if they stayed in any longer. 

“Come on dumbass, we have to get out before you pass out and drown. Because if you did, I wouldn’t be giving you CPR. So out you go you idiot…” Yasuke pushed Izuru’s shoulder, drawing him out of the trance he seemed to be in from the hot water; getting out and grabbing his towel that was moist with condensation and started to wrap it around his waist.

“MMhmm…” Izuru hummed nearly nodding off as he imitated the same motions as Yasuke as he got out with the exception of him wringing out his hair from the excess moisture; hair still soaked with water from showering and from the bath.

“Let’s just get going okay?” Yasuke dragged the dark-haired teen off, scowling at the stares they both received as they left, and a shiver going down his spine that he tried to convince himself was just from being cold.

*****

The next string of events was quite mundane as far as both teens were concerned. After having to endure even more stares from others, use of numerous towels, and an incident with a blow drier that Yasuke would never forget, the two of them finally reached Izuru’s room. Ready to change out of their dirty clothes, Yasuke waited impatiently as Izuru unlocked the door of his studio-like dorm room. He half expected the room to be littered with dirt and grime, trash and empty food bags, but much to his surprise the room was fairly clean minus a pile of dirty laundry in a basket in the corner of the room. The room was fairly strange though as the splatter painted walls were fairly odd, the furniture looked like it was moved various times given the floor had scratch marks on the floor, and the bed was a mess of blankets, comforters and pillows. So, when Izuru just pointed to his dresser and closet for clothes, Yasuke immediately went to see what the taller boy had that could possibly fit him.

“Hey troglodyte don’t you have any larger pants? Not all of us have tiny waist lines you know… Holy shit why are you naked again?” Yasuke found his face heating up as Izuru was quietly rummaging through a drawer, only turning to him to give a blank stare and hold up a clean pair of plain black boxers in front of Yasuke.

“I needed clean underwear and socks… Besides this is my room if I wanted to be nudist in my own place that’s my own business… But I’m not so you don’t have to worry… but seriously I needed new underwear and I assume you need them as well. Also, this isn’t some ploy for me to see you naked again. And you’re worrying about your waistline again? Miaya and I told you that you are fine, my pants or jeans should fit you, but if you are that uncomfortable, I could give you some sweatpants instead.”

“Shu-shut it!” Yasuke’s face heated up more as he snatched the underwear and started grumbling about idiots needing more brain cells.

“Here is a T-shirt you can use…” Izuru threw the shirt with the logo of some American energy drink at the teen doctor without even bothering to see if Yasuke was paying attention; So, the shirt landed on his head unceremoniously as he was glaring at the pants in the closet.

“Shit Izuru! Give a guy some warning won’t ya!?”

“I need to get pants too you know so will you quit staring at my jeans I’ll give you a pair I stretched out accidentally.” Izuru looked at the closet and grabbed a pair of jeans with the waistband slightly stretched out and held them in front of Yasuke as if expecting a thank you.

“Get moving so we can go…” Yasuke grabbed all of the clothes and a pair of socks out of the still open drawer, and moved to the bathroom that was on the other side of the room.

“I said I wouldn’t stare you know…” Izuru muttered, now dressed in zipped up hooded sweater with a shirt underneath, and a pair of black jeans, tying his hair into a loose braid and waiting for Yasuke to come out of the bathroom.

“I don’t own a scale… Matsuda if you are to keep this up you will have an eating disorder soon enough…” Izuru heard the shout of Yasuke screaming shit and other profanities, and promptly ignored him when the list was getting too long and predictable.

“Are you concerned about your weight because Enoshima said something about it?” The swearing stopped and Yasuke grew quiet, which was enough for Izuru take it as a yes. “Matsuda… I… I think you and Enoshima should break up.”

“Ugh for the last time you brain dead hippy, I’m not going to break up with her and just be sex friends with you. God what is wrong with you?” Yasuke finally left the bathroom wearing the slightly oversized clothing, uncomfortably shifting as he pulled on a long jacket he had found in the closet among the pants.

“I am saying this as a _friend_ , she’s a toxic person and I fear that you will fall apart under her if you continue this relationship with her. What don’t you understand about that Yasuke?” Izuru said sternly, locking eyes with Yasuke’s, a bitterness and anger in his tone of voice that was almost never there even when he was annoyed.

“This is not the time to talk about this. You’re just deflecting your anger and emo-ness unto me because you want to be distracted from how lonely you are. Come on we are going to be late.” Yasuke marched to the door to put on his shoes, ignoring the look the other teen was giving him.

“Yasuke I’m not doing that! I’m still upset… I just think talking about my own body image may have… triggered something for you. And I think maybe we should _both_ talk to Miaya about it. Even if it’s not tonight…” Izuru said carefully, from what Yasuke could tell he wasn’t the only one whose head started hurting from the logical and emotional rollercoasters that going on that day.

“Whatever just get going alright? And don’t forget your wallet or keys!” He yelled, walking through the doorway shaking his head in annoyance.

‘ _Why does that guy have to be all freaky and read my mind. Dammit I know already how bad Junko is I just can’t leave her alone. He just doesn’t get what love is, he’s just confused because of the problems his brother is having. I’ll just have Miaya talk him out of this stupid obsession he has over me and-‘_

“Matsuda…”

Yasuke’s train of thought was interrupted when the two boys were at the elevator to head to the lower levels of the dormitories and to the bus stop not far from the school. It appeared that Izuru was trying to get his attention for a while as the small grimace of displeasure was forming on the teen’s normal poker face. Sighing he just pushed the button for them to go down and within seconds the elevator arrived, some other students already moving out giving them a few odd looks, seeing the two out of their usual attire seeming to draw a lot of attention, but Yasuke couldn’t care less about their looks and pushed past them, grabbing Izuru’s hand and pulling him into the elevator. Earning a few more stares and some whispers from the other Main Course males. The small brained idiots probably thinking they were going on a date; something that Yasuke wouldn’t want right now with the current situation and with his friend’s current mindset. 

“Matsuda… you should really stop getting irritated by people’s stares, your blood pressure is going to increase at this rate.”

“Shut up, I don’t want to hear it let’s just get going okay?” Yasuke dragged him through the lobby as soon as the elevator reached the lobby and then toward the bus stop, just trying to get this day moving as quickly as possible.

****

With the continued stares from people Yasuke started to becoming more irritable; Izuru’s continued hold on his hand was not helping as the bus was overly crowded with people going home after work. Mothers with small children they picked up from day care, teenagers going to enjoy the night out when they should be at home, delinquents, businessmen and women, random jocks, all of them staring at the scene. It was as if they haven’t seen two guys holding hands; and if they were paying attention, they would have noticed that Yasuke wasn’t enjoying this situation. But he couldn’t expect much out of the regular populace, they always seemed to let him down. When he was a small child and now as a teenager and most likely as an adult as well if he lived long enough to make it to his twentieth birthday. Regardless they always let him down and he could never understand people’s fascinations with social interaction among regular people who get on their nerves so easily, but those thoughts weren’t necessary for now as when he arrived at their stop he no longer would have to deal with those stares.

Instead he seemed to get a whole different version of attention when he and Izuru entered the hospital where the clinic was located. When they walked down the hall toward the clinic area, he did not expect to see three people who shouldn’t be together seemed to be gathered in the brightly lit hallway. A meeting that Izuru definitely shouldn’t be around, shouldn’t listen into, and shouldn’t interact in any way. Izuru would be too unpredictable in this situation, and he had no idea what Miaya’s plan was this time. A few days ago, the Hinata’s had finally come to ‘visit’ their seriously ill son in the hospital after weeks of radio silence. The bug Miaya planted on the table when she was waiting for them to come, which allowed him to listen in on the conversation, left a bitter taste in his mouth. Even more so when he ended up refusing to meet with the parents again after trying to cheer up Miaya; dealing with the twins’ father was already a migraine for him so dealing with the mother too wasn’t going to be pleasant. If Yasuke was a lucky person he would have been able to avoid these kinds of situations, but luck wasn’t on his side that day. So, before he could even try and move out of their line of sight, their mother happened to catch them out the corner of her eye and immediately start yelling at them.

“Izuru! What on earth are you doing here?” Mrs. Hinata started a brisk run down the hallway, her high heels causing Yasuke a wince of pain with the loud echoes they seemed to make.

“Are you hurt? Who is this boy? Are you not feeling well? Oh, you should have told me and I would have come pick you up right away.” His mother fussed about him, the dramatic shift from how she treated her other child really started to piss him off.

“ Hey you! Aren’t you that kid that claims to be a Neurosurgeon or something?” Their father followed suit, all plans to be civil and formal seeming to have jumped ship as the two proceeded to ignore whatever conversation they were having with Miaya in favor of being over protective of their favorite child.

“Actually… I’m a Neurologist… Ultimate Neurologist… I amin the same grade as you son at Hope’s Peak Academy. My name is Doctor Matsuda…Yasuke Matsuda. It’s a pleasure to see you folks again so soon. Were you visiting your other son?” Yasuke tried to remain pleasant, forcing a too smug than intended grin on his face, and trying to force himself not to glare at the two ‘parents’ in front of him.

“I’m fine I was just accompanying Matsuda to pick up someone from the clinic before heading off to eat dinner. There is nothing wrong with me physically as of this moment. You don’t have to worry…” Izuru said mechanically, robotically, and most of all unenthused; if the tightened grip on Yasuke’s hand was any indication, he was mad.

“Well you fussing is great and all, he’s right. We have someone to pick up and dinner reservations to attend to. Miaya! Come over here we are ready to go eat. How about you?” Yasuke moved his body to have the small girl into his view; Miaya nodding her head in a silent affirmation for Yasuke to continue on with whatever role he planned to play that day.

“Are you sure you’re okay to go to dinner?”

“You don’t have food poisoning do you dear?”

“Here’s some money for dinner. Make sure to apologize properly as well for causing any issues. Not that you would, but…”

“Honey don’t speak to Izuru like that, he’s in a sensitive place right now….”

“I just don’t want him to-“

“Excuse me but I need to go with these big brothers now. You have a nice day Missus Hinata! I hope to see you soon!” Miaya’s voice breaking through the quarreling, a smile on her face that looked innocent to those who didn’t know here well enough, and a hand on Yasuke’s sleeve awaiting his next move.

“Right as she said we have to go. Hinata why don’t you give Miaya here a piggyback ride to our stop?”

“Sure…” Izuru let go of Yasuke’s hand and crouched down low enough for Miaya to grab onto him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and waving at the couple goodbye.

“Hey wait Izuru we aren’t done talking yet!”

“Izuru don’t mind Father he just wants to talk to you about a few things. Make sure to call us soon!”

“Sure…” Izuru responded flatly, his eyes looking dead as he turned in the direction, they were mean to leave and said no more; Yasuke following suit and saying nothing to the couple behind them as they walked. His mind started to drift once again as they waited for the bus stop.

_“If only things could be easier, then Yasuke wouldn’t have to deal with this. If only…”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also for anyone who was confused Izuru is TRYING to act normal even though he is actually still quite upset. He's going through a lot of things so trying to process everything is just causing him to revert back to normal instead of riding out his emotions properly;


	12. A Perfect (?) Trio? Miaya, Yasuke and Izuru

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izuru Miaya and Yasuke plan dinner together as well as a few other things...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If this seems rushed I apologize. I was excited to write and finish this but I was also doing this late at night so I am nodding off a lot when typing. Umm enjoy? Also comments are appreciated ;3

If there was one thing that could bother Miaya Gekkogahara it was that at the Ultimate Therapist there was only so much she could do to help others; patients could only go as far as they were willing to put in the effort. For Yasuke Matsuda one thing that bothered him was that there was only so much he could do fix the minds of others, the brain and nervous system as medical technology and human rights could allow him; human experimentation and the gore that came with it were things he wasn’t too pleased with the idea of being involved in. And for Izuru Hinata one thing that bothered him was his recent inability to understand the humans around him, their thoughts and their feelings becoming more of an enigma each day. Yes, for this group of friends they were limited by factors that were sometimes out of their control, and for better or worse it was hard to determine how it would affect them in the future.

Currently their situation had almost become incredibly unbearable, with Miaya having to avoid a prolonged interaction with her friend’s parents so soon after their initial encounter. She wasn’t ready to see them so soon in the week after their first visit, and having come from treating children with her mentor at the hospital clinic downtown she had to force herself to smile and act like nothing had happened when by coincidence she had run into the scummy parents of the Hinata twins. To make matters worse, Matsuda and Izuru had come to pick her up just as she was trying to leave the parents. Their treatment of Izuru becoming something of a discomfort for him as he kept a tight grip on Matsuda’s hand from what she could tell. When she and Matsuda had made eye contact, a silent agreement to go forth with one of their few plans for disengagement, she nodded for him to continue hoping to get out of that area as soon as possible. Izuru had just gone along with it as he usually did, and gave her a piggyback ride using her crutches to steady her on his back as they walked out of the hospital, all of them ignoring the continued stares they were getting.

“So where did you guys want to go for dinner? Fancy seafood restaurant that’s downtown? Ramen? Korean Barbeque?” Miaya said in a slightly cheerful tone, attempting to lighten the mood if only for just a bit.

“I’m not sure what would be good at the moment. I think seafood would be great but Hinata might want something else.” Matsuda shrugged, earning a hard look from Izuru.

“Oh, so now I’m just Hinata huh?” Izuru’s mouth curved slightly downward, not exactly a frown but it did surprise the surprise the other two students as it wasn’t like Izuru to get ‘upset’ over something like not calling him by first name.

“Let’s go eat some tasty seafood then! There’s a place downtown that has amazing eel dishes and seafood gratin.” Miaya started pulling her phone out of her pocket and reaching around to show Izuru the location of the restaurant.

“Hey why did you show Hinata it instead of me?” Yasuke inquired, confused as to why the shorter girl insisted on showing it to the guy essentially playing donkey and not have his either of his hands free to properly look at the directions; still not trusting Izuru’s sense of direction or rather his ability to pay attention to what he was supposed to do with his continuous habit of getting bored halfway through a task.

“Got it.” Izuru said monotonously, not trying to show how upset he was at Yasuke’s fickle nature with how he would address Izuru.

“Oh, we should get crystal shrimp dumplings while we are there! I heard they have upgraded their menu and now have a good amount of Cantonese cuisine as well as Chinese cuisine.” Miaya talked excitedly, a far cry from her usual quiet demeanor at school, a mode reserved only for her close friends as both boys had found out.

“Har Gow? Okay… hopefully their food is actually good this time so I don’t have to take over the kitchen.” Izuru mused, earning a laugh out of Miaya and an aggravated sigh out of Yasuke.

“Hey don’t ignore! Hinata when are you going to respond?” Yasuke said aggravated, earning another huff and what would have looked like an indifferent reaction out of Izuru from an outsider, but Yasuke knew he was being moody over something besides his current brother problems, and rejection from being sex friends, among other things.

“Maybe when you start calling him Izuru again. YAH-SUE-KAY.” Miaya giggled, emphasizing each syllable of his name for extra effect, earning a displeased look on the shorter of the two boy’s face.

“Sh-shut it! I’ll do as I damn please. That includes calling you Teflon brained dolts whatever I want.” Yasuke said defensively, earning an eye roll from Izuru and a headshake form Miaya.

“Whatever you say Yasuke. Whatever you say.” Miaya shifted a little starting to look at the menu on her phone, clearly leaving the conversation at that.

When they finally made it to the restaurant, Yasuke was about to kill Miaya and Izuru; the place they picked for dinner having been up a steep hill and way further from the hospital than he would have liked. Miaya on the other hand didn’t have to worry about her legs getting tired or worn out, having ridden on Izuru’s back the entire time, only seemingly to have to carefully gain her balance again when she was set down to use her crutches once more. And with Izuru being... himself, he didn’t even break a sweat, earning another death glare out of Yasuke. The only saving grace was that they were taken in for seating quite quickly despite it looking like a full house. As Izuru and Yasuke were to find out, this seemed to be on purpose, because within minutes of sitting down and ordering their drinks, and having Yasuke getting so close to being able to order some alcohol to numb this annoying headache he’d had from the emotional rollercoaster of a day and then failing to get it.

“Miss Gekkogahara! I’m so happy you took us up on our offer to serve you some excellent cuisine as thanks for helping our daughter!” The owner had come up to great Miaya in person, bowing many times in thanks, with Miaya only smiling gently as she exchanged pleasantries and insisting that it was only her job and that she needed no thanks.

“So… the reason you wanted to come here was because they’d give you a free meal?” Yasuke had said once they were once again alone, after several minutes on conversing, and looked at her skeptically wondering what her intentions could be.

“Honestly I kind of forgot they’d offer to treat me and whomever I brought to a meal on the house. I just really like their seafood dishes. They are from all around the world. The owner’s father was a student at Hope’s Peak Academy for being the Ultimate Seafood Chef or something like that. He worked all over the world and opened up several restaurants but this one in Japan is his most famous. He taught everything her knows to the current owner. So, all of the seafood is of excellent quality by either preparation or from where it was caught. I could go on for days at how delicious everything is, and they coordinate with the bakery across the road so if you bring your receipt from the restaurant, they will give you bonus stamps toward your score card and be eligible to get even more free pastries.” Miaya wiggled around in delight, clearly not the first time she had been there or the so-called bakery; if either of the boys were to try to describe this version of Miaya to anyone they were sure no one would believe them; even with Izuru’s ability to convince people of pretty much anything when he tried hard enough.

“So, you’re saying that they are immensely grateful to you to the point of just giving you free food?” Izuru looked at her for clarification, not expecting to be wrong but still wanting the clarification none the less.

“Essentially, even though I told them numerous times I needed no gratification. I was just doing what I’m good at, and was just able to get through to their daughter during her time of need and have her parents and siblings understand her. Apparently before I came along, she had already been to several different clinics and get no help. When my supervisor and I opened that clinic at the hospital I was able to get through to her within the first week of her being there. And well… it’s a matter that’s not appropriate for me to say here. Let’s just look at what they have on the menu okay?” Miaya held up the menu and immediately started reading it cover to cover, almost drooling at all of the delicious food written within the laminated pages.

“Whatever you say…I wonder if they have any salads here…” Yasuke muttered, looking over the menu himself but finding himself staring at all the entrees in almost the same type of drooling wonder as Miaya.

“I’m ordering a seafood hotpot for us to share, unless you want tropical shrimp pizza made with brie and a side of pineapple chutney that comes with it…” Izuru said matter of factly, making it clear that no amount of persuasion from Yasuke or Miaya would change his mind with picking one of the two options.

“Oh that’s a great idea! I think I’ll order some fried calamari and the crystal shrimp rolls then for us to share then.” Miaya added in quite happy at the idea of sharing various foods, clearly the only one there whose mood was lifted by a dinner among friends.

“I’ll get a house salad-“

“Denied.” “DENIED!” both Izuru and Miaya cut off Yasuke, the hard look in their eyes saying everything.

“Well I’m not going to eat what you shits ordered so-“

“Liar” “LIAR!” They cut him off again, giving each other a glance and a head nod much to Yasuke’s displeasure.

  
“What the hell are you two planning? I want a damn salad! Unless you want to share _that_ too?” Yasuke’s face growing red with each denial from his two very stubborn friends.

“Alright how’s this? You can make sure to order a great salad entrée we can share with dressing on the side. But you aren’t allowed to eat _just_ salad. Or else I’m going to fill you up on snacks at my dorm later~” Miaya gave a smile that looked sweet but with an undertone of annoyance; and some anger mixed in there as well.

“Ugh fine have it your way!” Yasuke got up and started heading where he thought the bathroom was located.

“Where are you going?” Miaya said somewhat shocked at the sudden movement from the teen doctor.

“Toilet. Just order for me that first salad option on the top of the menu or whatever if I’m not back in time. All of them seemed good anyhow.” He waved, somewhat irritated by their nosiness and wanted no more arguments at least through dinner.

When he arrived back, he noticed a bottle of ramune at each of their place settings, giving a look of confusion he was immediately responded to with a ‘We didn’t order it either’ by Izuru who dully played with the straw in how water glass as Miaya was staring at her bottle as if in deep thought on what to do with it. In the end the three of them just opened the bottles and drank them, much to the irritation of Yasuke, having to down the sugary drink because Izuru would have asked to drink the rest if he didn’t finish, and the last thing he needed was for Izuru to go into some flowery la-la-land because of ‘an indirect kiss’ with Yasuke that night. The thought of that was already creepy enough with how Izuru had be acting, or rather how much bolder he was being today. When the food arrived, the owner was back again personally delivering the food with one of his children, or from Yasuke could infer by the similar facial features they were probably parent and child, and they once again thanked Miaya. She in turn blushed a light pink embarrassed for the attention for ‘doing her job’ and thanked them before the three were once again alone to eat.

The rest of dinner was filled with idle chitchat, which means that Miaya did most of the talking, Yasuke would make so irritated comment, and Izuru would occasionally join the conversation with more than a ‘I see” or ‘I already guessed that was the case’. If he made two conversations on his own with prompting it was a miracle. As both noticed Izuru would tend to only engage if they asked him to; his bad habit of just going with the flow of events surfacing once again. Even though the food was delicious, Izuru had to be stopped by Miaya at least three times and twice by Yasuke to sit back down because ‘Just because you _can_ make improvements doesn’t mean you can do so without them asking. Why are you always like this?’. One of the few occasions in which Izuru did tend to see to doing things for himself was when it came to food. Although the reasoning for this varied every time from the food being too charred, to it’s overly seasoned, and to the one extreme case in which he started quoting a famous British Chef and nearly destroyed the kitchen plus its staff with just words and a steak knife. Sad to say they weren’t allowed back to that place and nearly got the school sued; turns out Izuru ratted on them to the local Health Inspector about ‘mysterious smells and improper hygiene’. It was the quickest they’d ever seen a pizza franchise panic over something. So, tonight was at least the tamest Izuru came when cooking was involved. Begrudgingly, as much as Izuru could emote it, he told the staff the food was good, but that they should change the seasoning for the hot pot and the shrimp dishes to make sure ‘all of the fishy smell is gone’. The bill never came that night, seeing as the owner really did intent to have their food on the house, but the three of them still argued what amount of a tip would be appropriate, only settling for a 40% tip based on the original items they ordered but got for free. They had to run out of the place, almost confused for dine and dashed by the one employee, as they were trying to avoid the owner or head waitress giving them their money back.

“Hahahaha that was super fun!” Miaya couldn’t stop from giggling as Izuru once again had to carry her on his back until they made it to the bus stop.

“Which part? The part where Izuru was going to go take over the kitchen like a tyrant? Or the part where I was nearly drowned from hot pot broth?” Yasuke glared, not amused by either occurrence.

“Yes. The answer is going to be yes from Miaya. I don’t know why you have to ask rhetorical questions Matsuda.” Izuru replied back, earning yet another dirty look from Yasuke and if he was able to see it, a pout from Miaya.

“Well whatever I’m just ready for this day to be over and get to bed.” Yasuke yawned, stomach too full of food and feeling sleepy from being so stuffed.

“Hold on you and Izuru are spending the night in my dorm room and _talking_ about your problems. Especially the whole ‘Friends with Benefits’ scenario that happened today and the ‘not all of us can be skinny twigs’ comment you said to Izuru. Don’t think I was ignorant of these events.” Miaya said in her most pouty Usami voice, minus the childish talking and lisp, looking ready to smack Yasuke upside the head with one of her crutches; if they were available that is.

“Ugh don’t use that creepy sweet voice on me, I get enough of that out of Junko and… why are you both glaring at me? How are either of you capable of holding that face for longer that five seconds? Last I checked neither of you could emote like that.” Yasuke tried to deflect the situation, walking ahead of everyone only for Izuru to speed up and match the doctor’s speed.

“You aren’t going to avoid me YA-SU-KE MAT-SU-DA.” Miaya grabbed his shoulder practically about to jump the other teen in the middle of the sidewalk.

“Miaya what the hell!? Get off!” Yasuke struggled, not realizing that his jerking around is actually what caused Miaya to switch places.

“NEVER! I WON’T STOP UNTIL YOU AGREE TO THERAPY WITH ME TONIGHT IN MY DORM ROOM!”

“STOP TALKING LIKE THAT! PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET THE WRONG IDEA!”

“Or the right idea...” Izuru deadpanned, having long since care about this silly spat.

“IZURU YOU ARE NOT HELPING!”

“Oh? I’m not Hinata anymore and I’m Izuru? Maybe I should start calling you Yasuke.” Izuru’s toned dropped, making a sultry voice when speaking, causing both Miaya and Yasuke to have pink tinged cheeks.

“IZURU I SWEAR TO GOD!” Yasuke yelled once more, struggling to hold Miaya’s bag and Miaya who was hanging off of his neck refusing to move from her place.

“Maybe if you go on a date with me I’d consider helping…”

“What!? No way!”

“Well… have fun suffocating, I need to run to the pharmacy here so I can get some stuff for tonight. Since obviously we won’t be allowed to leave her room when we reach the dorms, especially with Miaya acting so possessive and pushy.” Izuru once again deadpanned, unfortunately loud enough for many people to start looking at the group curiously.

“IZURU WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT SAYING THINGS THAT CAN BE EASILY MISCONSTRUED ?”

“Not to do it. But…” Izuru gave Yasuke a sideways glance. “I’m not in a good mood right now so frankly I don’t give a damn if it embarrasses you in front of everyone. It will be interesting to see how you fair while I’m getting our essentials for tonight.” Izuru put on a smirk, leaning in toward Yasuke’s ear and whispering.

“Good luck with all of the attention Yasuke~” Izuru then moved back in one fluid motion and walked through the automatic doors of the pharmacy, leaving a struggling Miaya and a red faced Yasuke who was already planning for revenge as a crowd of people already started gossiping on what was going on.

When Izuru had come back, Miaya was struggling to stand up, now having been on the ground for what he assumed as at least fifteen minutes and without her crutches; throwing her off balance as Yasuke wasn’t making a very good wall. Yasuke on the other hand as Izuru noticed was crowed by mothers saying some random Christian shit he couldn’t care for, some young college students coming up and saying how they were bi or poly and ‘supporting’ the threes relationship. A few fathers asking if Miaya was actually old enough to be dating such a suspicious looking high schooler. It was indeed amusing, providing a small distraction from the trip home; still trying to avoid getting back at a timely manner, but also feeling guilty and still going home at a pace that would be the shortest travel time possible for the trio. When Izuru made his way through the crowd, he scooped up Miaya to get her on his back once again, and threw the grocery bag full of cleansers, eye solution and other miscellaneous items at Yasuke. The tired teen growling about how it was unfair to treat him like a pack mule before begrudgingly running along with them.

*********

“Why the hell are we in these again Gekko- ugh Miaya?” Yasuke crossed his arms standing over the girl who was giving him a pout and glare; as Miaya who was busy crawling around on the floor setting up various futon mattress and duvets on the floor for them to sleep on.

“Because kigurumis are adorable and everyone should wear them. Besides you and Izuru look lovely in them.” Miaya said without a hint of malice, in fact she looked on cloud nine as she was in her own pink and white angel bunny kigurumi pajamas. “I’m so glad I took those measurements when we were at your office that one time.”

If Miaya was physically able to spin and twirl around Yasuke would know she’d be doing it at that moment. Although if she could do that Yasuke would have probably held no punches to give her a noogie on the head if she did do that, but Yasuke knew better than anyone that her lack of normal mobility wouldn’t allow her to, the best she could do would be to roll around on the mattresses as she laughed at the boy’s expense. Miaya on the other hands was too busy fixing everything for her friends to notice Yasuke’s current state of deep thought. Thus, when she crawled over one part of her floor which was waxed heavily, by someone who owned the room before her, she slipped and caused Yasuke to tumble over along with her. The neurologist moaned in pain as his back suddenly hit the floor and Miaya was at his feet and between his legs looking up at him sheepishly. Even when Izuru walked out of the bathroom wearing the penguin kigurumi Miaya had given him, the situation started looking like an online meme for the socially awkward penguin; with Izuru spinning around and walking to her kitchenette in order to avoid the random occurrence.

“Izuru stop being a socially awkward penguin!” Yasuke yelled, only to have Izuru look at him blankly and reply.

“I can’t believe you are memeing right now. What’s next are you going to start dabbing out of the room?” At that delivery Yasuke was unsure of what to say but Miaya started to burst out laughing, kicking her legs the little amount she could as she shook from the hilarious delivery.

“Just get your ass over here!” Yasuke sat back up, grumbling about his idiot friend who, as it turned out, was bringing over a tray of sweet treats, savory snacks, and tea for them to munch on.

“Whatever you say anxiety cat.” Izuru sat down at the small table that Miaya set up, placing the tray down along with him. “By the way the cat onesie looks very cute on you.”

“I know right! It fits Yasuke _purrfectly_ if I say so myself~” Miaya said in a cutesy kitty voice, one she normally used for small children, and smiled when Yasuke seemed to just grow more irritable and flustered at the comments.

“Alright enough of that. Tonight we are calling an intervention and meeting to discuss Izuru’s-“

“And Yasuke’s” Izuru interrupted, making it clear Yasuke wasn’t getting out of this situation.

“Problems emotionally. As well as address how the fuck we are going to cut off this tangled mess of hair. How did you braiding it make it worse moron?” Yasuke looked at the messy braid which seemed to contain even more knots than what they started with.

“Amusingly not even I know. It’s baffled me all night. Quite entertaining actually.” Izuru said with a slight hint of amusement in his voice, as if trying to hold back a laugh.

“Hmm well... I don’t usually take this approach but… Yasuke I want you to know since the three of us are all good friends we should keep referring to each other by our first names. You calling Izuru by his last name is not only confusing, it’s also quite rude. And while I do know that some of that snarkiness and rudeness is just a protective mechanism from you getting hurt, it also hurts those around you. Additionally I hate your girlfriend-“

“Oh god not you too. For the last time I’m not dumping her and getting together with Izuru. I already had to tell him that being friends with benefits was a terrible idea.”

“Well you denied my dating proposal I made to you last time I asked.” Izuru stated bluntly, causing Yasuke to stare at him agape.

“When the hell did you ask me that?”

“Let’s see… three days six hours and 45 seconds ago…” Izuru said, carefully picking up one of the snacks that fell on the mattress from the excitement.

“You got to be kidding me…” Yasuke rubbed his hand over his face exasperated by the entire occurrence and not even remembering that conversation happening.

“Ehem… to get back on point I think you should break up with her because of several reasons. Number one you seem to be concerned about your weight recently despite being told by many people you are of an okay body weight and BMI, so you starting to obsess over it was most likely due to her influence.”

“Geez did you tell her that Izuru?” Yasuke growled, looking at Izuru for a conformation, only to receive a ‘no’ headshake out of him.

“No Izuru didn’t tell me, but seeing as he brought it up as well this further proves my point. Secondly, I know what books you’ve been renting from the library and all of them having to do with behavior modification and conditioned responses. You are trying too hard to change Miss Enoshima who clearly doesn’t want to be changed. This relationship you have with her is toxic. I’ve heard her speak to you and she tries to twist you around her finger, make you dance and suffer for her amusement to see you in pain, but the worst part is that she genuinely _loves you_ but holds this sick obsession of hers and making you fit into her fantasies. She will get you involved in terrible things at this rate because you feel obligated to be with her.”

“Miaya…” Yasuke twitched at the accusation, opening his mouth to speak only to get interrupted by her once more.

“ And thirdly you are too attached to her Yasuke. I know your mother’s death shaped you into the doctor you are today but.. Just because Miss Enoshima saved you from your loneliness doesn’t mean she’s the best person to be around. I can tell just from her voice that she can be as cold and cruel as she can be kind and empathetic. She’d probably light the world on fire and watch it burn in amusement, being enthralled by the chaos and the potential of watching others suffer, even if they were her own family or…” Miaya hesitated, taking a deep breath before continuing and looking in Yasuke’s eyes. ” _lover._ ”

“I don’t need _you_ psychoanalyzing _my girlfriend_ Miaya. Junko can be a bit off the walls but you don’t know her like I do. She wouldn’t do something so crazy as to let’s say kill me in my sleep.” Yasuke replied back with a hint of malice in his voice, clearly unamused by Miaya’s speech

“Fine… We will come back to that another day. Now Izuru, I know you are still trying to sort out your feelings. Especially with those close to you. Could you tell me what’s been going on in your head lately?” Miaya said gently, holding up a fairly large plush cat out to Izuru as if asking him to hug it.

“I honestly don’t know anymore…” Izuru said carefully, grabbing the stuffed cat and looking down at its face somewhat solemnly.

“Well just tell me what’s been going on that has your mind all jumbled?”

“Well I…” Izuru unconsciously started biting the tail end of his finger nails. “I’m not… _happy_ with how my parents are treating Hajime. And I’m … _mad_ that I just stood by and watched all of this happen for years. I just feel like I’m … compelled to do other tasks that people tell me to do. I… I don’t know what to do right now since no one is saying anything to me. All because I refused to pay attention to things around me and I…” Izuru stared at the stuff cat in front of him as hot streams of tears flowed down his face and on to the plush.

“I see… that sounds overwhelming. You have a lot going on huh?” Miaya reached out to Izuru offering her hand to him as Yasuke watched stuck in confusion as Izuru actually _looked_ like an upset crying teenager for once.

“I-I ju-just…” Izuru had a hard time forming words, grabbing on to Miaya’s hand as if to support himself. “I don’t know how to deal with all of these _emotions…_ and it’s ju-just getting harder each day to get up and motivated. And even harder to fall asleep with the noises all around. I… I wish I could talk to Hajime but I can’t. And I can’t help but think every day the probability of him waking up one day soon, and I always am coming to the conclusion that the chances of him waking up just seem so slim. I… I just want someone to talk to...” Izuru said, surprising even himself from the words that came out of it.

“I see… but Izuru you can talk to Yasuke or I if anything seems to be too much. I’m sure you know our schedules by heart. And I know you think Hajime may be … _leaving_ you soon but you need to look on the bright side of things when you can and be optimistic. Despite everything I’ve heard and everything I’ve read, your brother loves you a lot Izuru. It’s normal to feel inadequate when your parents have a favorite child. And it’s hard to notice the suffering of others if they are good at hiding it.”

“That may be so but… Hajime… he… I just… I’m … so _scared_ I’ll never see him again.” Izuru said with a shaky breath, feeling that panic return for the first time in three weeks.

“Easy now Izuru. You’re fine. You’ll be okay now I’m going to ask you to do something for me okay? In this order name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. Okay?” Miaya gave a tight squeeze on Izuru’s hand, earning a nod out of the other teen who started reciting what Miaya asked.

All the while Yasuke spent his time starting at Izuru and Miaya’s interaction. Partially out of intrigue the other part out of _concern_ … While focusing steadily on Izuru, Yasuke started to notice a few things about the teen he hadn’t before. Izuru surgical scars that were hidden behind his absurdly long bangs, only noticeable with the amount of shifting the teen did and the unconscious act of pulling back his hair out of his eyes in order to dry them off. The next thing he noticed was that his eyes were actually two different colors. Heterochromia…. Izuru had heterochromia and that’s why he needed contact lens products. He purposefully put in red contacts to distinguish himself from his twin. And the third thing he noticed was that Izuru was holding on to that plush like it was his lifeline. Practically curled into a ball in not for his one hand holding on to Miaya’s still as she gave gentle words of comfort to the emotional struggling Izuru was going through. When he finally calmed down, he found himself saying one of the most insensitive things he had said in a while.

“Izuru what happened for you to have scars on your head?

“Yasuke! You can’t just ask people things like that so bluntly.” Miaya shot back a glare, where Yasuke avoided her looks in favor of watching Izuru.

“It’s not something I remember well so I don’t like to talk about it much. But… supposedly my parents were desperate for money and needed to gain more for some reason I can’t remember much about. Anyway… they ended up enrolling Hajime and I into some kind of twin study program. They gave us all sorts of drugs and tests, placebos, and tests like building things out of Legos in a specific amount of time, or how some chemical reaction worked. We… we both didn’t want our parents to suffer so we agreed to the study when initially enrolled so as you can imagine it was terrible. We were separated for sometimes days on end. And at some point, when they were doing a routine MRI, they found a tumor in my brain, probably caused by their cocktail of drugs. Or maybe it just grew more because of the drugs. One thing is for certain, that they thought they could get away with not telling us what they were doing to us. So… my mom got me checked out at one point and had me immediately go for surgery to remove the tumor. They didn’t do the best job of patching me up though, so I got these scars on my head and forehead. I’m… I’m not too fond of many people touching me in those places. That’s why I get defensive when people touch those areas.”

And with that there was silence all around them like the room was empty. Nothing but their breathing could be heard as they tried to assess what had just occurred.


	13. Sonia's Thoughts: A Princess or a Person or something in between?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sonia thinks over everything and the people around her, and what she can do. What should she do, and how should she act. Things untold to others and the secrets they keep, Sonia finds out one and decides to lock it away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh terrible chapter summary, probably a boat load of mistakes. 12-2AM writing this.... yeah this is going to be fuuuuun. Sorry for the rambling. I'm kind of coming down with a cold adn have been super stressed because my brother gave it to everyone and my mom is freaking out saying and I quote "I can't get sick! I can't get COVID!" among other things. 
> 
> So sorry if Sonia seems OOC I figure her understanding of culture and such she's trying to learn by observation as well as reading and interaction but she's still clumsy as to what to do. Should she act like a princess and claim order or should she act like a normal girl? But even then what is normal in the situations. I figured she'd be conflicted on how to intervene with others without overstepping her bounds.

Sonia Nevermind, the Ultimate Princess, next in line for the throne of the Kingdom of Novoselic a girl who in her kingdom is a princess before a person. However ever since her enrolled in Hope’s Peak Academy she was finally, for the most part, able to be a person before a princess; the thing that she had wished for the longest of times. This includes making friends with everyone in her class, even the stranger ones, and the occasional annoyance of certain boys she was always having fun. This had becoming even more true during her first year when Miss Chisa Yukizome had come in and replace her drunken, at times, teacher Mister Koichi Kizakura, and all of her classmates had come together soon afterward making things even more enjoyable. The ever listless and talents Izuru Hinata, even though he had to be encouraged into joining events, was able to talk to her because of their Class Representative Chiaki Nanami. Everything had become like the blissful school life she wanted for the longest time.

However even she as a princess and as a person knows that life isn’t without its struggles or trials. The events with Kuzuryu’s sister and then Hinata’s twin brother were evidence of this. The ever positive and joyful Nanami had broken down in tears one day, and later on that same day, the cool and collected Hinata had a panic attack. The two people who were the very pillars of their class had broken down and with it a lot of the order that had formed had gone along with it. As a student Sonia tried to replicate or at least intervene in a way that Nanami would. Trying to hold together the class, but it didn’t work as well as she had hoped. As the Ultimate Princess she should have thought of it sooner that people may see her as just trying to overthrow what was current social ladder but in reality, she just wanted everyone to be at least a bit happier and more cohesive.

Days went by after Hinata’s panic attack and her returned to school after a little over a week, a far cry from his initial three days he was supposed to take off. And even that didn’t last long, the days he came to class he was back to his routine of sleeping at his desk, or leaving to visit the Neurology Lab, often taking along Komaeda when the latter was getting the others riled up. However, Hinata wasn’t the only one who was skipping out, Nanami had as well; not initially as one had expected of the noble and benevolent girl but when things really started going downhill one week after Hinata returned and they were to write letter to Hinata’s brother as an apology for hurting the other boy. The tricks played on him by other members of the Main Course and the terrible rumors that were spread. Sonia thought everyone would do the right thing and agree to it but there was backlash from many people. The Student Council didn’t see the need for letters of apology to be written to the Reserve Students who were frequently harassed not only by their fellow Reserves but by the Main Course students as well who had participated in the harassment or made it worse. Not everyone was guilty of these crimes but that didn’t mean that the point Nanami brought up was any less valid. As a ruler in training, she knew that those who have committed a criminal act not matter how small need to face appropriate punishment. A simple letter wasn’t very difficult for someone to write but that seemed to be a mistaken thought, as when some of her classmates had brought it up she vividly remembered what happened.

“Fuck this! Why do we have to write a letter?”

“Even I as the Overlord of Ice find it very confusing as to why we have to write something to this unknown fallen knight.”

“Would you guys watch your damn mouths! Nanami is trying to say something!”

“Oh fuck off you baby faced Yakuza!”

“Who are you calling baby-faced you motor greased weirdo!”

“What was the guy’s name again Hinata? Himiji? Jammie? Hamjimeme?”

“I-it’s Ha-Hajime… eeeeck! Saionji pl-please stop glaring at me…”

“Oh right Hajammie!”

“I do think it would be quite wise to listen to what our dear Class Representative has to say…” Sonia said politely, taking a sheet of embellished paper from Nanami and sitting back in her seat.

“M-Miss Sonia! Why would someone as wonderful as you need to write a letter to some no nothing weird who’s just obsessed with the Main Course?”

“Mister Souda I am a student of this establishment and wish to let the poor boy know that if anything in the future bothers him that he can always rely on me. I would not be a good Princess nor a good friend if I couldn’t let those around me suffer.” Sonia forced herself to smile pleasantly, trying not to let out any malice that she was feeling with the negativity that seemed to be surrounding their class.

“Please if not an apology could you at least write to him and explain how you wish for him to recover soon. A ‘Get Well’ card would work too” Nanami pleaded, seeming to have a few of her classmates look thoughtfully at that.

“Well I don’t see how that would be beneficial considering the guy is practically dead as a doornail.” Komaeda said nonchalantly, causing Sonia to turn around and glance at the boy as if intending for him to explain further.

“What a scary look from our dearest Princess. I was just trying to say that I don’t know what use of a Feel Better card would be if the person it’s intended for is comatose. I mean it just seems like a waste of your time for such Talented people.”

“Geez… he does have a point. What is the point if the person can’t read it?”

“Oi! These aren’t just for him you know my sister and a few others were hurt too. You could write to any one of them! Some are afraid to go to school even though they got better!”

“Well then aren’t they just wasting the precious money their parents afforded to them for their tuition. I don’t see how that is our problem.”

“Why you…”

“Young Mas- I mean Kuzuryu please stop it’s not worth your time arguing with these imbeciles.”

“Come on it’s not like Hinata cares if his brother gets anything. Do we really have to-“

_SLAM!!!_

Simultaneously Nanami had banged her stack of papers on the teacher’s desk, and Hinata had hit his hands on his own desk, leaving small impressions on the wood as if holding himself back wasn’t working. And with a tear-filled face from the one and a cold, deadly glare from the other, both students had left the room without a word. Even Sonia wasn’t sure how to respond to such actions despite all of her knowledge of trying to handle conflicts. In practice it seemed so much more difficult than it was on paper. When Miss Yukizome had popped on in to see how they were doing, she had a grim expression on her face when asked about Hinata, later clarified to be Izuru Hinata which didn’t give her any better of an expression, and Nanami.

“Well…. About that. You see…”

“Out with it!” Kuzuryu yelled at their teacher, not caring for her delay, and quite frankly neither was Sonia.

“Look Nanami and Hinata were quite upset from your arguments yesterday and neither of them are going to come back until…”

“U-until wh-what?” Mikan asked nervously, not liking the expression on their teacher’s face.

“Until you guys give sincere apologies to them or the others you have hurt regarding our current, current events. This includes Nanami and Hi-Izuru.” Sonia noticed Miss Yukizome looking confused on how to refer to their classmate; indeed, it was quite difficult to determine which of the twins were being talked about considering their last name was only being used by everyone.

As expected, there was a lot of varied reactions but Sonia looked solemnly at her desk with the letter enclosed in an envelope that she had carefully made and even put the royal family’s seal on to close it. Handing the note to Miss Yukizome, earning a sincere thanks from their teacher and confusion from her classmates, she returned to her desk to think over all of the events that occurred. How both of her classmates’ health seemed to be deteriorating both physically and mentally. The two looked as if they were always nervous, always waiting for a phone call, always running their fingers through their hair, always having some nervous habit or tic that had been going on. She hadn’t been the only one to notice, and Gundam had clearly noticed as well, later on she found out even more people who noticed their health even without having to ask them. Their body language, their careful words, and silent pauses had spoken in volumes without them having to say anything more. It made her grow weary as the days continued and the space she had tried to protect seemed to be falling through her fingers. Even a couple of weeks later, but she did find a sense of happiness and joy in the most unexpected way when Hinata, _Izuru_ Hinata, had sent her a text message asking for her to come and trim his hair. The next morning Sonia had arrived with plenty of time before class was to start. Over in the girls dormitories where the 1-A student Miaya Gekkogahara lived she had walked in joyfully, shears in her bag and a excited mood to finally see her classmate after so long.

“Good morning and salutations everyone!”

“God dammit! Turn off the lights!” The Ultimate Neurologist as she recalled, pulled the hood of what she assumed were cat pajamas, and the duvet cover over his head, giving a large grown.

“The lights? You mean the sun Yasuke?” The monotone voice of her classmate, which at that moment seemed not extremely monotone but actually somewhat amused, said getting up from his spot on the floor; wearing what she thought was an adorable penguin onesie.

“Dearest Hinata you look amazing in those clothes! I must know at a later date where you got them from!” Sonia said with stars in her eyes, grabbing on to the boy’s hand suddenly.

“Morning…” Miaya yawned cutely, as Sona was even more enthralled by the cute bunny pajamas that the girl was wearing. “I can give you the website later. I’ll have Izuru give you my numbuuur.” The girl’s eyes looked like they were growing heavy as she also crawled under the blankets, and fell almost instantly asleep again.

“Sorry about them, we were up all night talking and… we only got to bed recently…” The long haired boy looked to the side, almost as if he was embarrassed by the whole ordeal. “I hope you don’t mind if we do this in the bathroom?”

“Certainly! I would be gracious if you showed me where to go!” Sonia left go of his hand and politely smiled, with a nod from Hinata she and him walked into the colorful bathroom where he already was tying a towel around his neck and sitting down on a small stool so that she could easily cut his hair.

“So how short would you like it? I may not be an Ultimate Hairstylist but I am quite fond of trimming my own hair ever since I found out I’d be on my own, even if I am not yet well versed in other comer things…” Sonia said sheepishly, just earning a blink from the boy as her mumbled a response.

  
“To my shoulders is fine.” He said gripping his pant legs of the pajamas as if he wanted to say soethign else but changed his mind.

“Alright! I will get to work then!” Sonia pulled out a couple combs and got to work.

In the end Sonia found out that the long hair of the boy was much different than her own. It was considerably thicker and seemed to be more knotted than what she last remembered. Taking it into seconds as she clipped several stands at once she carefully, albeit nervously, continued as lumps of what she now knew was dark brown hair not black fell to the floor. It was stiflingly quiet, and the words she had wanted to say, the apologies for not being a better classmate and friend, for not being a better leader, for not being a good enough _princess_ when both he and Nanami were gone, all of these words seemed stuck in her throat and she found herself unable to say anything. When it came to trimming his bangs, she took out a smaller pair of shears from her bag, looking at the boy in front of her nervously before getting to work. Hinata, no Izuru, had his eyes closed the entire time, his face looked tense, and he looked like he was… anxious. Resolving herself to continue, Sonia took up the long strands piece by piece, and instead of cutting them very short or remove them completely like how she originally planned, she made them into long bangs. Long enough for him to feel comfortable, long enough to make him still distinguished, and long enough to cover the things he wanted to hide. It wasn’t her place to ask, she knew that. The marks and scars that were carved into his body weren’t for anyone to see, and she wasn’t going to ask. Instead, Sonia smiled and tilted her head and sweetly said the following.

“Hinata is it alright if I may also call you Izuru? I know it is presumptuous of me to ask for such familiarity however I would love to further establish our relationship as friends and I was informed that here in Japan calling someone by their first name usually indicated that they were close friends.” She held the smaller shears in her hands, waiting as the deafening quiet around them seemed to grow worse.

“Sure… that’s fine… Just… don’t tell anyone please…and give me those shears.” Izuru held out a hand toward Sonia, waiting for her response, for once she heard a nervousness in his voice that she had never heard before.

“Of course! Please clean up the ends if you wish. I’ll be in your hands as they say.” Sonia smiled softly and warmly as he handed over the shears and watched as the other teen made the ends of his hair more even and more stylized.

“Also your secret is safe with me. As a future ruler I know somethings like secrets can be dangerous to keep, but as a friend I know that secrets are something precious and meant to only be to protect others. Therefore, will keep your secret close to my heart. Otherwise, I’ll eat a thousand needles!” Sonia said triumphantly; she didn’t’ expect a laugh, nor did she expect a serious of laughs, but that is what Sonia was treated to from Izuru, a small series of muffled laughing, where he nearly dropped the shears on the ground. 

There they were in the small bathroom, with long trails of hair on the ground, surrounding him like some halo. This was the new Izuru Hinata for Sonia, but at the same time it was still the same old Izuru Hinata. It was pleased, it was awkward, but the moment they shared there defiantly made her heart feel lighter even if was just going to be for a fleeting moment. As the alarm on her phone had rung, she had to quickly excuse herself, reminding Izuru to give her Miss Gekkogahara’s number to inquire about those pajamas; the idea of more occult themed clothes in that style made her very excited. As she raced to class, leaving Izuru to clean up their mess, Sonia hoped that she could continue to grow close to the boy, she may slip up from time to time with what to call him; even in her head she was still flipping back and forth between his first and last name. Everything changes each day, for better or for worse but in that moment, she was happy she finally was able to help soothe one of her classmates, her friend, even if only a little. Even though her heart started to grow weary once more as she entered the classroom, she knew something that others didn’t know, a secret she must keep and with a deep breath she walked on in calmly as she had always been. As a Princess she always had to keep her promises and as a friend to keep their secrets. But even she wanted to know if Izuru should just let one of the things on his mind be spoken to everyone, then maybe, just maybe, they could all begin to heal. But that was for another day, and another time.


	14. The (Un)Luckiest Guy~ Nagito Komaeda

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagito Komaeda is as complex as they come despite his exterior there is always a lot going on his head, sometimes too much. And even more going on around him, too bad for everyone who gets mixed up into his antics.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. To all Nagito Komaeda fans.... I have failed you. I probably butchered his character. So RIP me, but this was coming up eventually and it got written. So kick back, relax and watch the chaos that unfolds when you and your entire household are sick and you get so stressed out that you decide to do the bare minimum for cancer treatment mentions because you don't want to look up the drug durations and cross referencing for all of the drugs and seeing which kind of stage 3 cancer Nagito has based upon his limited info on the wiki about it.

Nagito Komaeda was simple. Or at least that’s what people thought he was at first glance. They saw a Hope obsessed fanboy who hated Despair with a passion. A kid with terrible and wonderful luck at the same time. A jinx to those around him, namely on Kazuichi Souda, while having won several lotteries and prizes that he never even entered; like how he ended up as the Ultimate Lucky Student despite turning it down and then still getting the letter anyhow despite tearing it to shreds. No one seemed to see past his façade of him _pretending_ to be a healthy teenager, that is except for three maybe four people: Jin Kirigiri, Izuru Hinata, Yasuke Matsuda and possibly his new homeroom teacher Chisa Yukizome. These people knew how sick he really was, whether it be physically or mentally; if anyone else in the school knew then he was none the wiser. However, he tried to avoid causing trouble for them, his wonderfully talented superiors needed to flourish after all. He would do anything to make sure of that, and if that meant getting rid of distractions or leeches then he’d do whatever it took to make sure those things were gone, or at the very least that they learned their place.

It would always work for him in the past, but somewhere along the line, while he was getting a check-up with Matsuda and Hinata was napping per usual, Matsuda greeted in his usual unfriendly manner the boy who shared blood with his prized Ultimate Hope; Hajime Hinata had run in and spouted off apologies, but not for him being troublesome, no but for _Izuru_ being troublesome. It irked Nagito to no end that two Ultimates could stand having some trash, someone on the same level as Nagito, be so rude and bossy. Yelling at the Ultimate Hope to ‘get his lazy ass out of bed and stop bothering Matsuda’, or telling the Ultimate Neurologist to ‘start investing in another bed because Izuru keeps taking this one’. But neither of them seemed to put him in his place. Nagito then witnessed this happen, again, and again, and even more times with each visit being some variation of the last but neither Ultimate saying anything substantial to put the Reserve student in his place.

So Nagito decided to take things into his own hands once again and started digging for information on the other twin, but finding nothing substantial, much like the person, that stood out. Well, nothing positive anyhow, as the older twin seemed to be stuck in the younger twin’s shadow. Nagito found it quite pathetic actually, whatever activity the two were in on together Hajime would be swapped out for either Izuru or another player despite working hard it seemed. This qualified in academics too, the other thing that seemed to further divide the two further as greater and lesser beings as far as Nagito was concerned. One day during his searches online he found a certain video of a certain mathematics competition that Hajime _wasn’t_ swapped out for Izuru, in fact Izuru was absent the entire time from it, and there stood Hajime working harder than his teammates who had given up all hope of trying to win. If Hajime had any talent to overcome this Nagito would have been ecstatic, he would have seen Hajime as someone who could be a beacon of hope despite being so talentless, but as Nagito saw the competition continue it only grew darker as the boy on screen’s anxiety seemed to sky rocket. There were numerous questions in English and Hajime was clearly having a difficult time understanding what was being said. Nagito had difficulty with _reading_ English as some of the words sounded too similar to each other, but speaking was a different issue, he could speak it just fine having grown up traveling with his parents when he was younger, and the number of audiobooks that were in English helped as well. Therefor it was amusing to him that Hajime couldn’t understand such simple words or phrases, how many sides does an octagon have, how does one prove that two triangles are the same, how does one prove that a figure is a square, and so on. His team had lost by a landslide and his teammates and everyone in the audience seemed to laugh at the pathetic answers he gave, having long forgotten about the scoring and everything else in favor of just mocking the kid. It was quiet Despairing to watch, but it was also quite amusing. It would be perfect to put the annoying Reserve back in his place for how he treated those above him.

Nagito’s plan was to just have the lowly Reserve Course student watch the video on the big screen with the audio being broadcasted to the school, however as his luck would have it he dropped the video when he was watching it replay on his phone in front of Kazuichi Souda, whom found it funny, and with a little convincing from Nagito was determined to show off the video in the auditorium; just nudging the pink-haired boy by saying how Miss Sonia may also find the video amusing was all it took. It wasn’t hard to sneak in Hajime either once he had anonymously texted the boy a way to get on the Main Campus unnoticed. Everything was going according to plan, but as his luck would have it the entire Main Course somehow heard of the video and was seated waiting in anticipation at the viewing of it, and Hajime wasn’t alone when the video was playing on the auditorium screen. The Ultimate Ultimate, the Ultimate Talented Student, the ULTIMATE HOPE Izuru Hinata was with him. It wasn’t part of his plan to have both brothers there, and he was sure something would go wrong for his plan, and unfortunately it did but not in the way he was expecting. The older twin had started crying and shaking in an anxious mess begging the younger to stop what was playing and to say something to silence the people around them, and from what Nagito could tell Izuru either said ‘no’ or ‘I don’t know’. No matter which it was it seemed to anger the shorter haired boy and he tried to punch Izuru in the face only to be judo thrown to the floor in self-defense; shocking everyone there. Nagito watched in s mix of pride and horror when it all happened, the one-sided argument, the laughing, the cheers of the Reserve Student being put in his place; it should have made him happy at the treatment the other was getting but he felt a large hole in his stomach, and his chest ache for a strange reason he wasn’t sure the origins from; at least he wouldn’t figure out about it until many weeks later why he felt this way.

********

When Izuru Hinata came back to class days after Nagito submitted he bare minimum apology, he like may others were in shock at the change in style that the twin seemed to have: his hair was much, much shorter, only at about shoulder length now and much more visibly aware that his hair wasn’t in fact black but just a dark shade of brown; his eyes were distinctly heterochromatic green and red something that none of them would have expected; and he was looking like he was actually getting sleep for once. Another thing Nagito was surprised by was that Izuru Hinata had invited him for lunch, albeit in Matsuda’s office, but lunch nevertheless; he should have felt thrilled to have lunch with the Ultimate Hope but he could only feel a sense of dread looming over him as he thought about what bad luck may be coming his way, and he was right to feel that way as it turned out.

“I am going to tell Jin to have you treated for your cancer. I have reported all of my findings to the Ultimate Pharmacist and she agreed to take on your _unique_ cancer case and develop a treatment just for you. And before you say anything about that Frontotemporal Dementia thing you _think_ you have, tat was a misdiagnosis, I’ve done so many brain scans of your head and nothing indicates that you have it. You’re too sharp witted to have any form of dementia, it’s all psychosomatic if you think you did. And I am _not_ wrong about it so don’t even try and say those other ‘experts’ told you otherwise. Those guys are quacks!” Matsuda had all but word vomited to him as soon as he took a seat in the office.

“I’m sorry but what?” was all that Nagito could blurt out, having been confused by the amount of news that Matsuda explained in such quick succession.

“Your cancer is curable and you are getting forced treatment because Jin Kirigiri is essentially your guardian.” Hinata had responded, holding his chopsticks filled with food up to Matsuda’s mouth as if trying to force the other boy to eat.

“Izuru stop that…” Nagito noticed the doctor’s face light up red in embarrassment at the intimate gesture, while Hinata remained as stone faced as he usually was with such blunt actions; but even Nagito could notice the slight twitches of a smile as if the other boy was trying to hold back from laughing.

“While I appreciate such concern from such amazing Ultimates as yourselves, I hardly think you should be putting such time or effort into someone like me. If anything, I should be servicing you in some way to help you all not the other way around—” And then Nagito was shut up by a scoopful of rice being shoved into the back of his throat causing him to choke.

“Here you’ll need this at that rate…” Hinata had handed him an open can of Dr. Hopper to his face, which he would have turned down if it weren’t for the fact that he was choking on food and needed something to wash it down.

“Yeah… none of that. I’m not dealing with anymore shitty emo teenagers being self-depreciating.” Matsuda pointed his chopsticks at Nagito with an accusatory glare; with Hinata muttering what he thought was the word hypocrite.

“If it weren’t for that attitude of yours, you’d have more than enough friends. You can be polite enough despite having a terrible upbringing in more ways than one… you are quite well read and educated, and you a relaxing to be around when you aren’t spouting all of that bull crap about Hope and Despair and how your luck causing so much misfortune.”

“But it does cause that to happen-“

“Yeah shutit! Point is that you need the treatment, we aren’t letting you die despite the fact a lot of people probably would _love_ for you to be gone in that twisted little world of yours… You _need_ help Komaeda whether you like it or not. I’ll have a shaman or some voodoo done on your hospital room if that’s what it takes for you to calm your ass down. This is non-negotiable and you can thank this asshole for persuading the principal director, whatever you want to call Jin, to get you treated against your will.” Matsuda stated matter-of-fact, continuing to pick at his lunch as Nagito just stared at the two boys as if they were speaking another language.

“I’m sorry I can’t comprehend this…” One million thoughts were running through Nagito’s head as to why any of this was happening, whether it was due to his luck or some other reason, it was so confusing and before he could even comprehend what was happening a stack of papers were being shoved into his hands along with a bentō and a command to eat.

“Those are all of the information about the medication as well as the medical release forms and the school medical leave forms and the understanding of remote learning while under a quarantine because your immune system will be trash for a few weeks while we treat you. Oh yeah and you are getting mandatory weekly therapy from Miaya as well because you have way too much repressed… stuff going on in that head of yours.” Matsuda waved around his chopsticks more as he talked, whether it was to avoid eating or to drivee his point across Nagito wasn’t sure.

The rest of lunch went along quietly with Nagito reluctantly filling out forms, and having been corrected on numerous occasions by Hinata about what things he was filling out wrong; he originally was doing that on purpose to delay getting treatment but it didn’t work in his favor. Nagito even tried to get a hold of Jin Kirigiri, despite telling himself that he wasn’t worth taking up the man’s time, which seemed to zig-zag in an odd fashion as his luck would have it. Jin made it clear to him on the phone that Nagito wasn’t wallowed to argue with this decision, and that he was going to be treated for his illness as he couldn’t afford any more scandals such as a student of his dropping dead despite there being ample and available treatment that the school could provide for its student. Nagito understood the amount of pressure the director was under with trying to get media controlled, get new students for next year, deal with some issues with parents, and what sounded like a cat that got loose in his office… Safe to say that Nagito wasn’t getting out of this situation much to his unfortunate luck.

By Monday of the upcoming week that is how Nagito found himself under hospital supervision for chemotherapeutic, radiation, and monoclonal antibody combination treatment. A cocktail of drugs to be given to him in various intervals, at different days or different weeks. Enough to make him sick enough just by their side effects alone if he was unlucky enough, or if he was super lucky, they’d be mild. Although Nagito could be happy being a stepping stone of sorts in terms of helping Ultimates reach their goal, this particular version of help via being a guinea pig, not really, for medications seemed to be more for his benefit than the Ultimates and that left a sour taste in his mouth. Especially when all of them seemed to have visited him not even one week into his hospital isolation.

“Hey Komaeda. I brought my extra game console for you since I think you’d be bored… And I wanted to talk to you…” Nanami held up a package that contained a Switch Lite and charger and no doubt a bunch of downloaded games for Nagito’s enjoyment, the gesture was thoughtful but even Nagito thought it would be a waste especially if it got broken.

“Ah Nanami is too kind, especially after I went and insulted her best friend. Nanami still is the wonderful class representative who cares so much-“

“Komaeda… you’re not going to trick me. You just want me to leave and have me take my switch back with me because you’re afraid of it getting broken. Hin- Izuru Hinata from our class already told me that you’d try to do that when he contacted me.”

“Oh… I see…” Nagito frowned, a mix of pride and disappointment filling his heart as heard Nanami continue.

“I’m not going to say I’ll forgive you for what you said about Hinata but it’s up to him to forgive you not me. But if you are going to apologize, I just ask you be sincere about it when you do. Because Hinata would do the same to you, he’d treat you like a _person_. So stop calling yourself trash and just take the game so I can play with you sometime when you aren’t bored of reading books or something.” Nanami shoved the package further toward him, at that point forcing him to take it, and give a small thank you to the pink-haired girl.

“You’re welcome~” Nanami said, smile unseen from the mask that she was wearing, but smiling nevertheless.

“Ah! Right! My streaming is going well so far. I even made enough money this month after a lot of work to at least be useful toward Hinata’s family.” Nanami said excited, the first time he’s seen her so energetic in weeks. “My cousin helped advertise it a bunch and got his teacher to donate and I even got a new set-up because a tech company replaced my computer and headphones, it’s awesome, so I’ll show you it via video call next time.”

“Nanami that’s wonderful, but you really should stop trying to hard to be nice to me. Afterall I was scummy toward your friend, in all things logical you should hate me right now.” Nagito said calmly, a smile on his face the entire time, part of him wishing he didn’t open his eyes afterward when he was met with a glare by Nanami.

“Objection! Stop calling yourself scum! And stop using the same excuse.” Nanami pointed at him accusatorily, and in a fashion to a very particular law game. “It’s a pain to try and move on over things but as I keep saying it’s not up to me to forgive you, it’s up to Hinata! And even if I am mad about what you said, I more heart-broken that you seem to project onto Hinata. I know you two could be very good friends if you gave him the chance. He’s a kind person and right now Komaeda I think you need that kindness. It’s a harsh kindness and kind of awkward, but it’s warm and calming, and it makes you feel happy because he actually takes time to understand you and listen to you. I think you two could become wonderful friends. And the same goes for the rest of the class if you would just open up to them…”

“I’m guessing a lot of them feel pity for me now that they know I don’t have long to live…”

“HOLD IT! Stop lying to yourself! Everyone that I’m aware of has told you no such thing.”

“Well my other doctors said-“

“Those were your other doctors though! Everyone here has great expectations of this treatment they are giving you and are certain it will cure you. I’d appreciate it if you would just let yourself believe that things will go well for you. And if it really is that hard then believe in the Ultimates who are trying to cure you, because the way you are talking is like telling them to fuck off for trying to help you and they don’t deserve that…” Nanami ended off quietly, looking at the boy with a downtrodden expression in her eyes.

“Alright…. I’ll try…” Nagito said quietly, looking down in the package in his hands as Nanami got up to leave, wishing him a goodbye as she exited the room, shedding the garments she was forced to wear to enter his room and gave him a small wave through the window.

“Huh… she looked thinner… I hope she’d eating enough…. But I guess I can’t say much to that… I hope this does break…” Nagito mused as he was now alone again with his own thoughts for the first time in a while.

“I must be the luckiest person in the world if this is the rotten luck I’m having…” Nagito looked down at the package with a note on top stating how the console was warrantied and games were backed up and it came with numerous memory cards; Nanami had truly planned everything out like a good Class Representative, someone he felt was too good to be his friend, even if only by a little bit…. Just a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bet most of you didn't think Nanami was going to make a cameo! Yes she is relevant she's just like in the background.... because she's like a hermit at the moment in her room streaming and still mad at some of her classmates. And if it still confused anyone. Nanami IS mad at people but she's more disappointed at them because of how they reacted. Since she thought they'd be supportive but they weren't and she didn't like how they all relapsed, momentarily, into their old selves before Miss Yukizome came. With Nagito she always knew something was off and she got a memo that he was pretty sick and just came to her own conclusions that he's jsut trying to push others away so she's having none of that. 
> 
> Soon I will need a Miaya and Chiaki chapter with Sonia just to have a girl's fluff fest of adorableness at this rate.


	15. Preview- Let's All Have a Fluffy Party!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Preview: Sonia helps Miaya plan a fluff fest and her two besties get invited (recruited ) against their will to participate in a slumber party.
> 
> Hijinx to ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Preview of the next chapter I'm working on which will be more humor and fluff. 
> 
> Sorry it starts out with drama.. . It keeps working it's way into the fic!
> 
> Dedicated to: MidnightMare247, Saradactyl, softsailor , and Century_Automata. 
> 
> Preview as I said again. I'll update it when I'm finished. Just felt like posting the beginning to see if anyone had any ideas on what they want to see, this is going to be a commenter directed chapter for the most part ^^""

“A slumber party for girls? Why the hell did you get invited Yasuke? Don’t tell me you decided that you wanted a pair of boobs of your own because you couldn’t get a hold of mine sweetie?” The voice of none other than Junko Enoshima, fashion icon and model, and Yasuke Matsuda’s current girlfriend and childhood friend laughed over the phone.

“Very hilarious Junko, but no, I have my hands full with other issues and I’d rather not play this game of you trying to psychoanalyze me of all people. If you must know Miaya decided to invite Izuru and I for some god forsaken reason. She even looked me dead in the eye and said ‘I don’t see the difference of inviting you and inviting all these girls. Gender sucks anyway so just come no one will judge you.’ Unlike half of her patients, _I_ know what I am an what I identify as so I have no freaking clue what she was getting at.” Yasuke yelled, clearly frustrated by the whole thing, and earning a laugh from the girl on the other end of the line.

“My My~ First names with her? Why Yasuke if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were getting some action with someone other than me. Maybe I should steal you away and lock you up all for myself. Or maybe I should encourage you cheating on me with other people and force you to-“

“Miaya insisted I call her by her first name, she said if I were to switch back, she’d pull me into a sleeper hold and not let go even during classes. And frankly I’d like to keep my brain cells and not loose them to some trivial matter such as calling people by their preferred title or name.” Yasuke interrupted the girl, rolling his eyes at her comments like they were nothing.

“Hmm I see… HoW BoOOoooorring~” Junko drawled out excessively, causing Yasuke to wince at the random change in tone and volume.

“Well this was fun and all but.. The Hell Izuru throw some clothes on! Stop walking around in your underwear!”

“This is my room Yasuke, I’m the one trying to get changed here.” Junko heard the monotone voice reply, growing an interest in the other person, but quickly getting cut off from the phone call before she could even ask who this ‘Izuru’ was to Yasuke.

“What the hell Izuru I was talking with my girlfriend!” Yasuke ran across the room and started digging through a pile of clothes, that were surprisingly clean, for his phone among the crumpled pile of overfilled laundry baskets.

“You mean your domestic abuser. I was trying to save you from a pointless conversation… Also, I hate her.” Izuru stated bluntly, walking over to the pile of clothes himself and looking for some unknown article of clothing.

“When are you going to get dressed you lazy bum!” Yasuke seethed, already in his own clothes for the day, ready to go shopping for this damn party he was roped into.

“When I find my shirt I was looking for, also while you’re here help me fold these. I need to room clean.”

“Why the hell are we cleaning _your_ room exactly? Isn’t this ‘party’ supposed to be in that rich princess’ room or some bullshit?” Yasuke threw a shirt at Izuru, still looking for his phone in the bottomless pit of clothes. “How the hell did you acquire so many clothes?”

“My dying grandfather decided to take me on a shopping spree.”

“… Izuru since when is your grandfather dying?”

“I don’t think this is the time to talk about my problem when we have to clean this room because Sonia Nevermind realized my empty space in my dorm makes it a better place to hold a party. Also… I have to buy her and possibly seven or more other people futons from Don Quixote apparently. “ Izuru hummed picking up a plaid flannel shirt, folding it and setting it to the side.

“Fine we will talk about it at a later date. But who may I ask is paying for all of this exactly?” Yasuke all but grinded his teeth in frustration still not having found his phone.

“Jin Kirigiri… Because I’m mad at him and told him that I’ll sue him at this rate. That was a joke stop looking at me like that. Sonia is paying for it, or I should say she’s going to pay for it when she accompanies you to Don Q...Which do you think works better for me black or gray?”

“Just pick something for fuck’s sake and help me find my phone that you threw into this black hole of clothes!” Yasuke threw another pile of clothes at Izuru, who just sighed and continued to fold the clothes, as he ignored the other boy in favor of finding his somehow still silent cellphone.

“Salutations everyone are you ready to go to the store of the Spanish…. Why aren’t you dressed yet Izuru?” Sonia Nevermind slammed open the door in a dramatic fashion that was too suited for the young princess but extremely jarring to both boys.

“It’s Yasuke’s fault…”

“Don’t blame **_me_** for this you maggot head! You just _had_ to let this pile of clothes get so bad that I can’t find my damn cell phone that _you_ threw into said pile!” Yasuke rebuked, ready to pull out his hair at any moment. “Someone please kill me!”

“Sorry but I’m not a yandere so I would very much like to keep you alive and preferably not suffering to an extreme extent.”

“Hey are you three ready to… Izuru why are you still in your underwear we need to go soon or we will miss our bus.” Miaya hobbled in on her crutches looking confused at the scene, with Sonia now helping fold clothes next to the half-naked teenager.

“This is going to be a long day…” Yasuke lamented, feeling dread for the umpteenth time that day hoping someone would save him from this hell.

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure how up to date a lot of these are:
> 
> Trans lifeline: 877-565-8860  
>  Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696  
>  Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433  
>  Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255  
>  Treavor Project: 1-866-488-7386  
>  Sexuality Support: 1800-246-7743  
>  Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438  
>  Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673  
>  Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272  
>  Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000  
>  exhale: After abortion hotline/provoice: 1-866-439-4253
> 
> v--- I didn't make this but I found it, hopefully it's still useful....
>
>> I made a list of some international suicide hotlines. RT/share to save a life. [pic.twitter.com/e1QxltnTzu](http://t.co/e1QxltnTzu)
>> 
>> — Save A Life Project (@SaveALifeP) [March 23, 2015](https://twitter.com/SaveALifeP/status/579813731321978880?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw)


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